General Chat

Pasta has a life of it's own here too................Stray said twist it as you put it in the pan and it won't stick together.

I did exactly as I was told and it snapped and flew everywhere.................I'm back to putting a drop of oil in the water now.LOL

Love the plastic spoon custard recipe.:))

I found a melted something in the cooker one day.............turned it on and when I went to put the meat in I saw a blob of something really smelly.

It was our daughters plastic pelican bib................she hated it, so must have hidden it in there! LOL

xx

Put made custard and put bowl into electric oven to keep warm while we had our dinner.
Got it out of oven to pour onto apple pie and there was this red "blob" in the bowl of custard. When I got it out, it was the plastic spoon that I had mixed it with.
This was in my early days of marriage. Also done the casserole dish on the open flame on the cooker. It had mince in. Where do you start to clean it all up!!

Make caramel - forget that the pan needs to go straight into cold water to stop cooking. Chisel caramel off cooker when cooled.

Put large amounts of alcohol into homemade Xmas puddings. Heat them in microwave. Throw them out of window (onto the flat below's kitchen roof) when they catch fire.

Try to tame the 'tagliatelle monster' (born from way over-estimating the amount of pasta needed to feed 6) when he oozes out of the saucepan. Discover that a jugful of sauce disappears with no trace into the monster's insides.

Put a chicken in the Aga to cook. Forget about it. A week later, wonder what the heap of chracoal in the Aga is.

Put the Xmas pud in oven to keep warm. Take it out and realise that the plastic lid has welded to the base. Obtain wire cutters.

I was only responsible for one of these, but involved to some degree in the others :-)

Kitty

I am just adding a post as I need to go out now but it will remind me to see how my Mum cooks :-))))

Rescued this one from another thread...................anyone know a publisher?

Find a Delia Smith recipe and follow instructions carefully.

Remove from oven and show them off proudly..................dropping a few in the process.

Take the rest off the tray and place on rack to cool......wondering why the pastry is breaking.

When cold pick one up to taste and the rest of the pastry crumbles away to nothing:((

Finally..................buy some frozen pastry and try again!

xx

Never ever put chicken oxo in a cheese sauce...............*shudders*

Nudge for joy

xx

This thread is getting quite interesting with tales of culinary disasters, perhaps Kitty's book is not such a bad idea after all. :-)

If confession is so good for the soul CC.....why havent we seen any of yours?. I of course have never had any, my cooking has always been of the highest of standards :-))))))))))))))))))))))))))





Apart from when.........nope.....no good....can't think of any

when we first got married 40 years age my oh asked me to cook cabbage and ribs i bought a sheet of ribs and a big big round cabbage put them in seperate pans to cook the ribs cooked great but the cabbage well it wes like trying to cook a football, it was only when i told my dad and he had stopped laughing i found out i should have cut the cabbage up

When i first got married i washed the lettuce in hot water in case there was any green fly on it Told oh i had forgot to buy any he found it in the bin Valxxx

A long, long time ago, when I was first married, my new husband (well, he was then - not anymore, after nearly forty years!) caught me reading a cookery book at the part that gave instructions for cooking sausages.
He has never let me forget this.
And I did the classic thing of cooking a chicken without taking out the giblets in their plastic bag. No Delia in those days!
Probably the daftest thing I ever did as a newly-married was to put a large plastic bowl down onto a still-hot burner on the stove.
It took me weeks to get that plastic off the stove top.

Kitty,I am known for my cooking and have a key ring saying i kiss better than i cook.Hubby was in hospital and i had to cook dinner. for my young children.I thought beefburger chips and baked beans.Had to get the bus to the hospital, village time.When i gave my children there dinner they put there fork in the beefburgers that exploded fat up my walls beans and oven chips were cold.I grabbed the plates back and shoved them in the oven to warm up.All the plates exploded and i had chips beans and beefburgers around my oven.I had 3 hungry kids as we had to leave to get on the village bus to go to the hospital where my kids pleaded with there dad to come home lol Annie

Double sunday disaster. Forget to take chicken out of freezer to defrost until late on Saturday night. Leave it out at room temperature overnight to defrost.

Come down in morning to find cat proudly showing off remains of said chicken which he 'caught'

Throw cat and chicken out, and make toad in the hole for sunday dinner..

Place pyrex dish with cooked toad fresh out of the oven and stand back while said pyrex dish explodes and shatters into a million tiny pieces.

Have Wimpy for Sunday dinner.

With me ? * shocked *

I think you should open a cafe as well Kitty....

Oooh DAff!,

How could you!.....I'm still laughing and can't write quick enough!


Ahem! right now where was I..... wmsl.....Oh yes.....bragging......now let me think!.......

*nods sagely at Helen*

Susan does, you know!!

*runs as fast as she can into safe place!!*

Love

Daff xxx

wmsl Helen,

Just trying to do one better than CC with her bein so smug and who hasnt lived if none of it has happened to her lol

You're just bragging now Susan! lol

My Yorkshire pud rose so high, it got stuck to the top of the oven.....I tugged and tugged until I fell backwards onto the floor, and the yorkshire pud ( well most of it anyway ) complete with tin flopped right onto floor just missing me.

My Grandad used to keep hens for eggs and the odd old one would be for the pot. He gave one of these to my mam when she was first married, telling her she might have to boil it for a bit first.
Well she boiled it, then she roasted it and it was like rubber – completely inedible. She threw it out for the stray dogs and even they couldn’t chew it so left it.
Not her cooking though I hasten to add! The Hen must have been about 50.
See you tommorrow Kitty.
And I commend you for keeping on trying. You're an inspiration.