General Chat

My book will contain various culinary disasters a la Kitty

Recipe 1

Chocolate soup

Take a packet mix for brownies and put too much water in the mixture

Mix madly telling yourself that it will form soft peaks eventually.

Give up when your arm goes numb and prepare cake tin.

Pour the mixture carefully into the cake tin ................then watch helplessly through the cooker door as the chocolate soup seeps slowly out of the tin.

What do you think?

xx

I will buy it Kitty for sure!!!


Hope you are well, love,


Caz xxx

wmsl Kitty,

Go for it!

erm
r u giving the said book away or do we have to pay for it hun

????

stray
xxxx

Sounds good to me, Kitty! I'll buy a copy of your book. Any more disas..I mean great tips??

lol

pmsl, Kitty, that is brilliant!!! More, More!!

*standing ovation*

Claps hands furiously




wonders if that might have been just the teensiest OTT?

Love

Daff xxx

I am on a roll here...... ~~~~~~~~~~waves to all~~~~~~~

Recipe 2

Again all true.

Cook some rice to go with the shop bought curry

Boil water in a saucepan and add the rice

Decide that a mug must be the same size as a cup.............and add 2 measures to the pan.

Watch in surprise as the rice swells as it cooks......................then swells some more.

Try desperately to remove a layer now escaping from the saucepan.

Having removed a fair amount................slam the lid on tightly to let the rest finish cooking.

On hearing the smoke alarm, check to see what is happening..............throw the saucepan and blackened mass stuck to the bottom into the garden.

Freeze the curry sauce to use another day and get a chippie

xx

Are you writing this in icing or attempting sugar art .....if so I suspect it may go pear shaped somewhere along the way ........ :)))) Maddie

pmsl

am sayign nothing

stray
xxx

Can I make a contribution?

Stawberry jelly/wine

Put too much water in,
Wait a bit
Realise it won't set
Drink from wine glasses

It's a 1950s recipe from my mam when she was a young un

Can't wait for the book
Will it be optioned for Hollywood?
Who'll play you? Have you any preferences?

OMD's..And i thought my layered lemon meringue pie was bad..lol

*slaps a copyright on thread*

only protecting yer interests, Kitty.

I reckon we could turn this into a whole series of mini dramas.

*CallsCecil B De Milne*

PMSL

Confession is good for the soul.............I hope

Last one for now

Recipe 3

Casserole Surprise

Place steak, kidney and vegetables in a pyrex casserole dish

Add beefstock and cornflour to thicken it.

Place in oven until it looks lovely and the meat feels lovely and tender.

Remove from oven really carefully and place on cooker top.

Glowing with pride, leave kitchen to call OH in for dinner

Hear a loud BANG

Rush to the kitchen and look round to see the casserole………………..over the walls….on the floor………dripping from the ceiling and ………….sizzling on the cooker top.

Spy a circle of the casserole dish holding a single sliced carrot on the still lit gas ring you put the dish on.

Make egg and chips instead.

I know……………..hard to believe……………but all true!!

xx

Put mixture into blender and.................


forget to put top on.

My mother did!!

xx

Helen....................you can contribute to the disastrous desserts section! lol

Copyright .................ooh good idea,

*wonders how many copies to print*

I always put the lid on the blender!! *she lies* LOL

xx

Have had cake not risen syndrome once or twice but they make lovely big biscuits!
lol

I've had that too.................fairy cake frisbies.......even the birds wouldn't touch them.

xx

Also had a dropped corned beef pie, I dropped it before I put it in the oven and although it wasn't dropped upside down it wasn't very tidy. Tasted lovely although I was the only one who fancied it!

*makes notes*

Good thinking..................children are pretty easy to please really.

Got to go now, will see you all tomorrow.

xx

My Grandad used to keep hens for eggs and the odd old one would be for the pot. He gave one of these to my mam when she was first married, telling her she might have to boil it for a bit first.
Well she boiled it, then she roasted it and it was like rubber – completely inedible. She threw it out for the stray dogs and even they couldn’t chew it so left it.
Not her cooking though I hasten to add! The Hen must have been about 50.
See you tommorrow Kitty.
And I commend you for keeping on trying. You're an inspiration.