General Chat

Gwynne, I think you've hit the nail on the head there. Hating people for harm they've caused you isn't difficult. It's forgiving and forgetting what they did that is. If a person hasn't been harmed to any great extent, it must be difficult for them to understand how others can hate those who have harmed them. I think we should all allow each other, and ourselves, to feel and respond individually to our own experiences, and not try to impose the 'love, peace and forgiveness' philosophy on ourselves or on those for whom that would create greater anxiety than expressing justifiable hatred. Anger and hatred bottled up do far more harm to a person than that which is expressed. CB >|<

I have had moments of blind hatred but find it too exhausting to keep it at that level. I can usually let it go. I try to save hatred for the truly deserving - Hitler comes to mind. There have been people I've disliked intensely but there is no one I've hated on a personal level for longer than a few days, I've been lucky in that no one has harmed me enough for me to feel the same hatred that others on the thread feel. Gwynne

Len - can I bring my hedge clippers too?!! Blunted ones so that the suffering was prolonged... Lily (AKA a Christian)

Thank you to all who have added Like Felicity, I have always tried to hate the behaviour, not the person, but it is not always easy is it? Hi Len (of the Chilterns) I have read Narcissus and Goldmund and Siddartha by Hesse and found them both fascinating. My quotes come from a book of quotes and are often added to the board to reflect things happening at the time. They don’t necessarily reflect my own views. With the terrorism that has been going on I thought it would be interesting to see what comments would arise. Remarkably few people seem to have commented on hating terrorists and other criminals. Some people are able to forgive those that have committed the most terrible crimes and others of us hate the people who have committed them. Sometimes, and I STRESS only sometimes, if you know what has happened to someone in their own lives, I feel you can actually hate the behaviour and still like the person. We none of us can fully understand why terrorists, or in fact paedophiles, behave the way they do. Perhaps there is the capacity in all of us to commit crimes, especially if we are influenced by others to believe that what we are doing is ‘normal’ or ‘acceptable’. Dee xx

Yes I have. I still do and always will. J

Oh, Len, thank you for those wise words. I'm not very far off old myself and do agree with you. Life has taught me lessons that I'm finding hard to learn, perhaps just don't want to, paarticularly when I was once close to the person concerned. My father always told me that I got an unhealthy dose of idealism and he was right!! :-) It's a fault I'm still working on. (One of many!)

Felicity I am an old person now and have seen a lot during my lifetime and have met people who are just plain evil. It is impossible to separate some personalities from their deeds, believe me. Unfortunately, you have to see it to believe it so what can I say to you? Len

I'm trying very hard not to, right at this minute. Not sure it's worth the effort though. Keep chanting - hate the behaviour not the person; hate the behaviour not the person; hate the behaviour not the person............ Nope, not sure I can do it!

YES HAVE DONE,STILL DO ,ONES ALREADY ROTTING IN HELL JUST WAITING FOR THE OTHER THREE TO JOIN HIM,GOD TOOK THE WRONG ONES WHEN HE TOOK MY MUM,BROTHER AND NIECE. THERE IS NO ROOM FOR FORGIVENESS AND IF THEY WERE ON FIRE I WOULD PEE ON THEM,WOULD LIKE THEM TO GET USED TO IT COS THATS WHAT ITS LIKE WHERE THEY ARE GOING. MY LIFE AT THE PRESENT CANNOT FULLY GO FORWARD BECAUSE OF THESE PIGS.

Dee I read Herman Hesse's book Magister Ludi with interest (a long time ago) and have read other articles by and about him, and concluded his philosophy was a bit odd odd times. What was the source of your quote? If you have read his works I respect you but I cannot accept the premise of the quote. I hate paedophiles and have read the case histories of some that I would recommend for euthanasia. I was once asked if I would consider counselling one. I replied that I considered the condition was incurable (ref. Ray Wyre) but that I would do so if I may use secateurs. I was hauled over the coals by management for my politically incorrect attitude. Your quote suggests that I have paedophilia in my personality. Correct? len

Yes i have, and she caused me no end of pain when she was alive. R.B.x

I hate people who cannot acept someone else's opinion without becoming vindictive,( after all everyones entitled to an opinion) and thereafter continually snipe at them behind their backs, not nice. Len

I absolutely despise the woman/thing that lives next door to me. Over the past 5 years she has made it like living in a hellhole. I wish quite often when she goes out she will not come back again. I have never felt like this about anyone else and I don't like it, but it's an onslaught of hatred. She has made our lives intolerable and always gets away with whatever she does. That makes it all the worse.

No. :-) Joy

yes Dee....with a vengeance.....in particular my mother in law for all past incidents.....and currently my hubby soon to be ex hubby for blatantly lying in our divorce proceedings.....and the reason being.....I hate him for what our children will find out about him at some point in the future.....that he didnt give a toss about them and used them as pawns for the divorce etc....and not only hate.......I pity him big time....cos he will never be able to get back their childhood and will never have the wonderful memories that I collect every day of their lives...i hope he ends up a miserable old man!! moan over!! Jill x

Agree with Bendy, hate the terrorists andthose who ruin others lifes...not at all like them I hasten to add! L XX

Except that it an emotion, I cannot accept that hate is connected to love - any more than blue is connected to yellow. I have loved, disliked and hated, three separate and distinct emotions.. I have met people who were truly evil - and I use the past tense as I hope they are dead and can do no more harm in the world. I have hated what some people stood for, and attempted to achieve, and have tried to kill them. If I met a bomber I would have no compunction in putting him/her (perhaps 'it' is a more suitable pronoun) down. Because of earlier training I doubt if they would get the benefit of doubt. Len

Dee Right now i'm finding it very hard not to hate two people in my life, but i deffinately don't see anything about them in myself at all. Far from it to be honest. Deb X

Hi folks Thank you all for responding to this. We seem to have some very mixed views and it has been interesting reading them all. Dee x

Maz,I know how you feel.I hated my so called mother.I also hated the bas turd (not using bad words here!!) who tried to kill me,regardless of my 5 children being there..See now,after 8 years,I find I am totally indifferent to him and that seems to annoy him all the more.He dosen't know how to handle that.Good....... Hop-a-long.