General Chat

Hi Bec have you had a course on Business Ethics I think thats what it is called, ask your boss, A person should not invade someones personal space or touch you, I remember that from the course I attended, James :<))

Bec, Rupert has a point, but you might like to consider this course of action - How about saying to this man, quietly and politely, ' I'm sure you don't meant to be patronising and intimidating, but that's how it's coming across to me. Do you think you could try to not pick fault with me or talk to me as if I'm a small child? I'm happy to accept any training you can give me if it's done properly.' Said politely, and indicating that you think he's unaware of his actions and perfectly capable of changing his behaviour might take the wind out of his sails and at least get him thinking. Only you know him well enough to know if this will work though. You've had lots of good advice so far.

Bec... know how you are feeling - I had this once when I worked up in the city and it is horrible... please don't let this person intimidate you they are just not worth it... unfortunately there are some people who just don't know how to be pleasant... You must complain and let him know that you wont bve bullied. Take care Lynda x

RB - Maybe, I think it's more that he's put out by someone 20yrs his junior being employed despite having no experience! Well tough! xx

Just seen this. Keep your chin up, Bec. :-)

Bec, have you not considered that this mans actions are part of training? To see your reactions which as I know myself could occur when you interview a particularly obstructive client. Rmember you have to hold your feelings sometimes under particularly trying cicumstances. Have you not thought that this may be a way of finding out if you will make the grade. I have seen this before and the senior manager may well be aware of this mans attitude. It may not be particularly nice and may seem to go against the principles of the normal work place but i have known the practice and been part of the training ,not as an intervier but as a particularly aggressive interviewee. Could be all part of your training . Rupert

Thanks everyone :0) I think he just feels threatened. I've secured two more interviews today and two more vacancies and he's got NADA! I won't let him get me down! xx

Don't worry about this t....Bec.he is digging his own grave,i would say your boss is no fool and is letting the prat show himself up for what he is,bide your time.Fred.

Bec ...poor you...you are obviously so good and efficient this guy feels seriously threatened.....thats his problem...not yours.....so just ignore him..... Rise above it ....cos he aint worth the worry babe Julie x

Bec - tell him in front of others that you took a call for him from the pen15 enlargement clinic!! Seriously though - to say 'thats just his way' is absolutely no defence against bullying. Definitely speak calmly about it to him but be firm and tell him you do not like his manner or invasion of your space. Also defo keep a written log. Good luck. Lucy x

Bec if you have hardly had any training then ask your boss to give you some. I was in same position years ago and eventually the strain got so great I quit and I regret that more than anything, Stand up for yourself don't let him get you down and if this bully continues see the boss again Norah

can't say anything that hasn't already been said Bec's but as a boss this senior is really boardering and ever so slightly overstepping harassement guildlines. Keep your chin up and keep a secret log of the incidents (just in case). If you can take the person aside and talk to them tactfully might be a first step. tell them you appreciate their input but not the way it is being done. Good luck and keep us posted. Debs

Hi Bec You've had a lot of good advice already. Just like to say you are an intelligent girl and they wouldn't have given you the job if they didn't know you were capable. Don't let him get to you. ((((((HUGS)))))) Juliexx PS I like CB's idea lol

If he likes trying to belittle you infront of other people try playing him at his own game - in the nicest possible way of course! If he pats you on the head, tell him you aren't a dog and ask him to keep his hands to himself. When he makes snide remarks, ask him if he was born rude or just practices very hard. Tell him you feel sorry for him. It can't be much fun when your only pleasure in life is putting other people down. Good luck in the job. Sounds like you are doing really well so don't let bully-boy get to you. Janice

Bec, If he stretches out his hand to pat you on the head again - BITE IT !!! CB >|< X

Bec,Sorry to hear about your problem,however, as you have been told to use your head,Perhaps you should get a large pair of 'Nutcrackers'and place them in a prominent position on your desk,then explain to him what they are for i/e Cracking Nuts (HEADS).meybe he will get the message. Best Wishes,Hal.:0<))))

Oh Becs I wish I had known you were doing that!! What agency? You have the ability you just need to temper your perfectionist streak and just swallow what he is saying..... wither that or pull him to oneside and explain that you are finding it all a bit pratronising!! Good luck! xx

Hi Bec, What this man acctually done by touching you on the head was that he invaded your personnal space. Next time he comes too close, i would remind him of that, ( use your arms to make a circle around yourself and tell him in no uncertain terms that he is not welcome to enter your personnal space and if he does it again you will report the invasion of your privacy ). As for not being helpfull and putting you down in front of people in your office, find out if he is mean't to be training, overseeing your work. If he is then have a quite word with your boss, to get the matter sorted out. Michelle.

Sounds like he's a right old g*t! Everyone seems to have given good advice so far. Have a ((((((hug))))), and give your face a splash with cool water and try to ignore him (not easy, but have a go.) Also try to get someone higher up informed, they can try and keep a quiet eye on him from afar. :-)) *Thay do say you always hurt the people that you like/ love the most! Although in someways I hope not this time*

Bec, Angela is right, it's bullying. The fact that you're almost in tears shows how wrong it is. You need to speak to your boss. Make it clear that while you don't want to rock the boat or get anyone in trouble, the way you're being treated is wrong and has to change. Hope you get it sorted soon Paul xxx