General Chat

but im increasingly upset , feel like im an interfering old granny
as you all know i love my kids to bits, i adore my grandaughter, and think im so honoured to be given such a gorgeous little person to watch play hear her giggle, cuddle and love

i knit for her and always buying her outfits, worry when shes poorly, babysit her at drop of hat,even when ive worked all week and come home on fridays at 6pm, ill babysit her overnight here from as soon as i get in till whenever they wana collect her on saturdays,

it seems lately daughters getting real snappy with me, we popped in hers saturday, she was taking babes to a tea party, she was wearing a denim pinifore and tea shirt as it was cloudy first thing, it turned out to be so warm out she had just woken up so i said can i get her ready for the party,

that was wrong thing to say, daughter said i was going to let her wear that, as i carried her out garden to see her daddy and grandad
i was then told by my OH to leave her, as daughter was saying about me wanting to change her
and daughters fella then (she says jokingly)said your cars down the road go home if you want,
i wanted to run ,
today they fine
i got new shoes for babes cos she outgrown her others,
and daughter phoned me jsut, to say babes still not well she had to buy new outfit while out as her tummy so bad and she crys with it briefly till pain goes, shes been like this a while
i suggested allergy maybe to food, when we talked at weekend of it,
today wen i asked please take her to docs have chat with him,
shes obviously in pain,
gotta go she says and thats it, before she rung off i said is that mum your nagging, she says yeh

sorry bout the winge, sometimes it puts it in prospective i spose , a trouble shared and all that

thats what nanas are there for hun lol

Julie love, you care thats obvious!!

As you know ive had big run ins with my teen lass, i wonder if its girls that are at odds with us?


All my love,


Caz xxx

Coming at it from the mother of a granddaughter I have to say that there are times when Grandmothers can be interfering even though they're not aware of it.
And they do it with all the love and best intentions. It's just that sometimes when you go round something may have gone on that you weren't aware of and your offers of help and advice came across as slightly nagging maybe.

i know sally i thought of that, im glad you said from your side of it,
i tried to calm her by saying i only wanted to dress her in pretty dress, nothing frilly, , just cool and summery, i havent got a little girl to dress up anymore now your all grown up,
but it just back fired on me,
when she got back from the party she popped in here, me and my OH had been shoppin and id bought stuff in Boots sales, two little dress, and pjs,
she said oh theyre nice, and promptly put the thinner dress on little one 'cos she was hot'
little one loved it all bright ,

thanks guys for all your views

I had slight 'run ins' with our Grandma over party clothes. Well not run ins exactly I'd smile sweetly, nod in the right places, and then once she'd gone put my daughter in what I wanted her to wear.

lol
i back down, i left babes in what she was wearing
didnt want to bother her as she looked like she couldnt be bothered herself at the time

I clearly remember one day when our youngest was tiny I went to Mum and dad's.

She was fast asleep and Mum was telling me I had to wake her for her feed...................I looked at her and reminded her she was my daughter, not hers.

I know it hurt Mum, but after that we all got on so much better:))

With my grandchildren I would hate to be seen as interfering......................so I only give advice if I am asked for it.

It will all be forgotten about I'm sure. And I am also sure that your daughter appreciates you, even if she doesn't always show it. There are just times when someone can say something and it seems like they're having a dig, and when you mull it over later you realise they weren't.

i know

i guess it ll all be fine tomorrow,
it seems more often than not when i say something i got three of um snappy at me, daughter, her OH and my OH,
i just laugh it off at the time, but then when they not around i could cry,
my mam used to parcel up frilly dresses for my duaghter all the time and post um to us in germany, she would ave something new on every day, mum and dad missed a lot of the early stages, as we culdnt just pop round

I had similar with my Mum and Dad as they're in Canada (although Mum died last year). So we've had loads of clothes and sent pictures of the kids over wearing them.

I have not had that problem as neither daughter or son live close enough to pop in. But isn't it strange how daughters and daughters in law are different?

With my daughter whenever we visited when the children were young I was encouraged to treat them as if they were ours. we bought them loads of clothes, always took something when we visited, could discipline them when naughty etc.

With son's two, I have always gone very carefully. DiL and I get on fine, love her to bits, she is lovely and a fantastic Mum. But after the first couple of times when they were young babies we never take anything when we visit except for birthdays and Christmas, and this is the only girl too. They are fairly well off so don't need us to buy things and I know I would not be welcome if I spoiled them or disciplined them (unless when we look after them when the parents go away).

Strange really.

Ann
Glos

My Mum died a few weeks before I got married. Her first grandchild was born the following year and she never had the chance to be a Nana.

Take a deep breath, smile and let it all wash over you.

I can remember my Mum telling me that when I was tiny she had bought me a practical winter coat. My Nan didn't think it was pretty enough and went out and got me a pale coloured one. My Mum said it had annoyed her because it seemed a waste and also undermined her decision as the mother. Sometimes well meaning grandparents might need to step back a little.

Sue
x

Is this a new problem or on going cos i was woundering if it is becuse little one is off side and she is worried about her hugs Valxxx

i dont understand val

babes still gets hugs, they dont mind that, in fact they here every day at lunch time when i get in from work, they stay the hour im home,

it seems every week it can be simplest thing i say,
like my OH says to me maybe they should start resteaming the bottles,
i suggest it and its a tut and like im accusing them, when its only a suggestion,
or i gently say, try her on cows milk, maybe its the lactose in the powder , maybe, just a thought,
i dont say oh i wouldnt giv eher that, or dont wana do that,
its usually my daughter that bites my head off,
its not a recent thing,
it just now it upsets me more cos i cant help making a suggestion if they tell me, and daughter takes it like im going on!
i tell her all the time shes a great mam, and im so proud of her, and how strong a person she is,
i dunno,
maybe mother and daughter thing, :-)

I'd tell OH to suggest things like that himself, rather than you doing it.

lol
thats a good idea,
shes not as quick to shoot her dad down
in fact she doesnt

Always the way in my experience. :)
Feed info to her via her Dad. Just don't let him know cos he'll say stuff like 'Your Mum thinks....'

get Howie to sort her out Julie,-Ann,:}}

I dont have any problems,I interfere all the time,,,and never get told off,,and dont care if I do,,,,,,,,,:}}