General Chat

Yes I know how you feel. I was deeply saddened when I discovered a 42 year old father and his weeks old daughter both died the same day of Cholera. Also my Nanna's first-born and only son died age 5 weeks of pneumonia.

Found out that my Nan had a sister that died when she was 11 months old of measles. My Great Gran was 6 months pregnant with my Nan when this happened and when my Nan was born they gave her the same name. Being as the births were so close together I had to get all the certs. to sort it out. My Mum never knew and she said my Nan had never mentioned it so probably she never knew either. Very sad. Linda

There was also my Grandad's elder brother (who had a twin sister) who was killed in very tragic circumstances one Saturday afternoon in June 1883. He was at Victoria Hall, Sunderland for a performance by a children's entertainer, along with hundreds of other children, and he must have been sitting in the balcony seats. At the end of the performance, people onstage began throwing sweets to the children in the audience, so those in the balcony seats rushed to the staircase. When the first ones got to the ground floor, they came upon a locked door and there was no-one there to open it. As more and more children came charging down the stairs, many were trampled to death or injured. My Great Uncle was one who died. He was 8 years old. His twin sister was probably there too, but she must have survived, as I've found her marriage in 1900. As so many children died in the tragedy, the Town Council commissioned a memorial to them which used to stand in Bishopwearmouth Cemetery. Due to perpetual vandalism, it was moved to Mowbray Park, and I hope to go and see it for the first time later this year. If anyone's interested, there are details of the disaster on these websites - http://www(.)north-country(.)co(.)uk/victoria.htm http://www(.)sunderland(.)gov(.)uk/Public/Editable/Themes/Lifelong-Learning/Local_studies_fact_sheets/Fact%20Sheet%205(.)pdf CB >|<

Well I haven't uncovered any surprises yet, but I know both my aunt (mum's sister) and my mum both gave birth to stillborn sons, and both called them Richard. I was born about a year later and I had a premature daughter who lived for only 3 days. My father had a brother who died, but I know little about him. I don't know why I never asked - he was referred to as poor little Lal. On a family photo a relative in Wales has sent me, there are 4 young boys, three I know as my dad, his brother Jim and his brother Bill, but I don't know the other little lad, was he Lal? Maybe I will never know, he is so blonde compared to the other lads, perhaps he was a cousin visiting or someone around at the time - wish dad could let me know through a message - come on now, dad, send me a sign please.

Oh CB that's so sad!! families hey? Who'd have them!!

I've found several infant and child deaths in my tree, but the one that really got to me was the one who I found as an orphaned pauper in the workhouse at the age of 11. All the more tragic, as his cousin who had the same name and was born less than a year before him was living in the same town, only a couple of miles away, with his parents and siblings - quite well-heeled and comfy. CB >|<

Helen I agree its horrific...... and I knew me wasn't only one to face this!! Sometimes people's sad stories make you realise how lucky you are!!

There are so many sad stories we uncover in the course of researching .. I found out my father had an older brother and sister who both died before the age of two. I believe their deaths were basically down to poverty and bad housing (in East London). My father's parents also died within two years of each other (before my father was five years old); one from t.b. and the other from pneumonia - and we're talking about the 20th century here!! Helen

Oh me sad again Just found the twins that Grandma was telling me but couldn't remember their names....... Grandma would have been 11 when they were born. And me sort of disappointed that she couldn't remember her own siblings names...... but hey she is 101 now so I shouldn't complain about her memory! She had told me she had a sister called Maisie and it turned out she was a twin to Leonard who lasted just under a year and Maisie died when she was 2. I'm so gonna find their graves and go see them!! xx

I was searching for, a sister,I had little to go on except she had died as a baby 20 years before I was born. When I found the GRO spot and saw her age as 0 it affected me very deeply. All I could think for a few days was that 0 was zero, nothing, without value, not worth a mention, etc. She had lived for 6 weeks and I felt that was all she had. It still bothers me, damn it that 6 weeks was her life !! XX Continue to care and be sad , it is important XX Jeannine

I think most of us have probably bee touched by this. My mum was raised by her grandparents as her mother died when she was young. She always talks about her nan as a really hard woman and cruel in some ways. Its only since i've been doing this, that i have realised what a hard life my g gran had, She lost her 2nd child at only 18 months old, Two years later her husband was dead. She remarried and had a son (pre-mature) on 17th Dec 1931. He died aged 6 days. Exactly a year later on 17 th Dec 1932 she had another son. He was ok. The next son was born premature and she was told he was going to die. She refused to believe it and carried him around on a pillow to protect him. Against the odds he did live. Also my aunt had a daughter who died after scalding herself to death, she was 2 years old. My aunt ws heavily pregnant at the time. Time was taken up with the inquest and my aunt had a son. He died the day she burried her eldest daughter. I can't imagine how they carried on. Pat

A 2nd cousin sent me some certificates including the birth and death certs for a sister of my Gt Nan, poor thing died age 1 week, her birth and death were registered on the same day but the saddest thing of all is she wasn't even given a name in the name colume it just has a line and her surname. Her father registered her birth and death maybe he was too upset to think of one. I cried my eyes out when I read that, and have added her to my tree as Baby, I couldn't bear to put Unnamed female. If it wasn't for my cousin ordering the certs for unnamed female we would never even knew of her existance The same family also lost another daughter age 18 months and a son age 12, these still sadden me but at least they had names. Michele

Yes Diana, me too. My younger sister only lived half an hour. This was only in 1965. I still get tearful when I look at her death cert - have never shown my mum as I don't think she could cope with the stark terminology used. I found her grave for the first time a couple of years ago - she was buried with 3 strangers - no stone. This year we are hoping to have a memorial put in the Baby Garden of the cem where our dad is buried. My dad had a brother who lived 2 days - he was also buried in a common grave, no longer there though as it is in Woodgrange Cemetary - the part that was dug up for building flats. Dad's mum also apparently had stillborn twins, but we are still searching for proof of this. Maz. XX

My Mum had 7 children all die in infancy between 1921 - 1933 when my sister was born and me in 1938

Yes very sad. My G grandfather went to Canada in about 1906, leaving his wife, 2 sons (6 & 9) and daughter aged 7 (my paternal Grandma) behind in Wales. He sent for them in 1909 once he had a homestead, but within a couple of years Sam, the elder boy died of TB. The other son died aged 20 at the very end of WW1. Until I started my tree I had no idea my Grandma had brothers, I never heard them spoken about. By all accounts my G grandmother didn't want to emigrate. She was quite a genteel lady and the only child of a master mason, and to live as a farmer's wife on the Praries in Saskatchewan was totally different from her life in Wales. To lose both her sons so young must have been dreadful, especially knowing her relations were so far away. I also found that my paternal Grandad had a sister who died of TB aged 10, also in Canada at around the same time. I have a photo of Great Aunt Ella, and she looks like me and my younger daughter at that age, but as far as I know there are no surviving photos of Great Uncle Sam. I suppose finding out about Ella's death upset me more because I do have a photo of her, and that somehow makes her more 'real'. Sue xx

i wept when i found out last year that my gt gt grannie had a little girl who died before her first birthday - the little girls name was Lily which is one of my favorite names - (would have been one of my daughters if exOH had agreed)

This isnt a child but I have only now put the kleenex away... A death cert arrived yesterday of my greatgran The family have always thought that she died in childbirth to my great aunty Lil.. Oh no she diddnt!...she died of broncitus a couple of months after Lils birth! You want to know why it made me cry?.....cos theres no one left I can tell :-(( Gerri<<the last one of this generation.

I had an elder brother Peter born aug 1944 died oct 1945 of diptheria luckly there was room in the grave of m y g gran and g gdad so he was buried with them my dad only had one week with him as the war was on, my cousin born and died at 3 month was buried at the side of the path in the cemetry as were other still born or others that died very young if you had little or no money Val

I have one lady in my tree whose first 5 children do not survive past their first year. She goes on the have a further 7 children. It always brings me to tears when I look at that part of my tree. I don't think I would have been able to do what she did. Joy

I found quite a few in my tree but the worst was finding I had a baby brother I knew nothing about.Died 1wk.old.would have been 65yrs old He was the first born. Mum and Dad not around to inquire as to what happened.