General Chat

Having read CB's great tale I was inspired to do my own and again please ignore spelling/grammar. Apologies to all of you who didn't go and are bored with it all!! 'ang on

*wonders if she should run away now! lol*

She stepped out of the car onto the windswept pavement of a far off northern town! Oozing elegance and sophistication, she entered the hotel foyer causing the staff to splutter their pints as they struggled to their feet to welcome,,, Kaz.. Kaz waited anxiously for the others to arrive, daydreaming of food and envious of the others scoffing goodness knows what .. she longs for the safety of the Palace. Luckily for Kaz, the lovely Babs arrives shaking as she ticks off the names of the people who will gather in this room, Kaz sticks a name badge on to remind herself who she is later on! The young Tracey Orangeblossom walks in looking more nervous than Babs as they sit waiting for the onslaught! Then it happens, the good and the great and the celebrity start to arrive!. Wow that’s Lemon (looking so erm Lemon) and BC and Haddock, Sue and Jan, Ann and “oh no” Sue Smith. The celebrity sits down and begins writing notes in his big book (scarey), the lone trekker and his bruv and later CB, Jenny (nearly a brummie) and Joan arrive (cos they have a posher hotel than the rest of us).

eeeeekkkkkk

As soon as all the glasses are refilled it’s time to talk, Sue S. and Kaz give Andy a few tips on things he should include in his trek bag – Sue suggested haemmoroid cream and Lambrini and tries to glean info about the object of her stalking!! The celeb found his Dictaphone, CB showed her medals, Ann was, well, was Ann, Joan admitted she came from a place called “Ponder’s End” and personally knew Ponder, Jeanette was fishing for ideas on well erm fish as she propped up the bar and Lemon was fuffing. Jenny showed an unnatural liking for Jasper Carrot and resurrected his now infamous song “funky Mowped”, Beth found Jon and BC, well, was too busy eating choccies. Sue Smith got out old meet pics to reveal Kaz in a very similar top to the one she was wearing but as Kaz explained they were both by the same designer (ahem). Then we have the photo sessions that are now in the public domain and the grand finale is a photo opportunity organised by our celeb, we all put on our best “we are genealogists and we haven’t had a drink smiles” but unfortunately cans of carling are caught on film. We have to say goodbye to some of our friends as they make their escape and Kaz looks on wistfully as she has no such escape plan.

Our hostess, Babs suggests that the remaining 16? move on (as we are getting chucked out at 7) so it is decided to pay a visit to the hotel of the Unfortunate five. This was one of the Boro’s less well known… erm, less sought out.. erm, pubs with rooms. As the unfortunate five settle in, the rest mingle with the locals pretending they are from Amsterdam, Sue and Ann play pool but have trouble with the balls, Sue hits a local with her cue and Ann dances with her’s (cue not local), the rest just drink and natter and drink and natter then our lovely hostess piles us back into the minibus for a whistle stop tour of Middlesboro streetlife as we dodge past the police to get to the off licence, then on to Babs house for more! Am a bit stuck for words now as everything starts to get a bit blurry, Tracey, Beth, Andy and Jon get a good send off, GR gets raided and unsurprisingly the thread is not there the next day but nobody can remember/don’t want to remember, what they put! The rest party on till 2.30am and then it was definitely time to go! BC suggests the unfortunate 5 should walk back to their hotel to help said celeb to sober up and maybe the rest of us too. Ooh it was very blooming cold as Daniel escorted by BC and Sue Smith followed Kaz and Lemon into the night. Miles and miles, on and on they weaved.

Then as Lemon and Kaz neared the hotel they were propositioned by two of the inhabitants of this town and a fee of 15 pounds was mentioned, however, Lemon and Kaz were not sure if this meant for the two of them or each, something to ponder but we shall never know now. Inside our salubrious rooms, Kebabs were needed but unavailable so Daniel shared a scouse chicken sandwich and some chocolate with us all. He then curled up on BC’s bed, Kaz recovered from palpitations, Sue Smith squeaked, Lemon was poked by springs and BC threatened Daniel. Kaz got tangled up in one of BC’s nighties as we trundled off to bed about 4am. Next day we all arose at 8am full of the joys of spring (NOT) had a rather large breakfast as Daniel and Kaz discovered that Lemon could never work for MI5 and at Sue and BCs suggestion we drank Lambrini whilst awaiting our lovely hostess Babs. Kaz drove back to the Palace happily and thought perhaps the peasants weren’t so bad after all!! Big Mwah to babs and many thanks

PMSL...Kaz!!!! That was brilliant and.....spot on!!!! More...more!!!! well, I know everyone who wasnt there will be bored, cos I would if I hadn't been there if you know what I mean, but hey...that's o.k.!!!!! XX BC

Very good Kaz! I wish I could have stayed over..........but I'm not sorry that I missed Lambrini for brekky! LOL

Kaz PMSL

LOL....Kaz, did you see Jenny's picture of the burnt roast we nearly had at the Pub on Sunday? Its on Photopage....

Will take at look now BC

BC are those pics of your left overs??

No the landlady's husband put the oven on too high and ruined the dinner...so she just said *od it and we had crisps instead.....llol

Yay Kaz! Well done! You got all the bits I missed, except for Daniel having to be dragged off someone else's bed to his own. Now, I seem to recall I wasn't supposed to mention that, but the bung wasn't forthcoming, so what the hell? I noted your mention 'full of the joys of Spring' - would that be one of the ones on Lemon's bed, by any chance? Mind you, I shall have to watch what I post on here from now on. Babs told me I wasn't what she was expecting. When I asked her what she WAS expecting, she said, 'An old woman!'. I never realised I looked a bloke! LOL CB >|< XX

It's because you are so mature on the Boards, CB:-) XX BC

You weren't what I was expecting either CB

Ohh Kaz thank you I am sat here with tears streaming down my face, PMSL;;; That was brilliant and just what I needed after a night and day of worry over kicking out a computer problem that has take loads of my files and links with it. ;; I have been so depressed wanted to cry but you ((((((((hugs))))))))) have just lifted my day with that ;; Than you Babs x x x xMWAH

Kaz You all sound as though you got up to no good when we left you Wish we had stayed over but next time hopefully....and will you be wearing your GR meets top LOL Jeanette You would pass on Lambrini for brekkie ..but what if it had been voddie LOL love Jan x

I'm even more confused now - and getting seriously worried! Mature on the Boards, BC? You've got to be joking! LOL What on earth WAS everyone expecting? CB >|<