General Chat

How the 12 Signs Deal With 'Near Death' Experiences!! OK Whos First??? Give me your starsign please!

Aries Deanna X

Taurus - I'm intrigued! Helen x

Cancer

OK Deanna - Very Brave of you to volunteer!! ARIES: 'Who's in charge here? I'd like to see God right now, please. Am I dead? Gee, I never thought that could happen to me! Where can I get a crystal palace backlit with white light like that one?' ;o))))

Okay Kim.... that's me. But I'd be so much nicer about my demands!! LOL Deanna X ;-0)

OK Christine!! You Ready? BTW - No cusps allowed (you will have to wait for an Aquarian reading and chose the one you like the best!) CAPRICORN: It might take Capricorn a little while to realize he's dead because there are special rooms set up to look like executive offices for newly-dead Goats. A sharp-looking, older gentleman-ghost comes in and gives Cap an instruction manual titled HOW TO PROFIT IN THE ASTRAL MARKETPLACE, plus a 'job evaluation' type assessment of Cap's achievements and mistakes over the lifetime, followed by a pink slip (meaning the body revived). Caps tend to return to their bodies quickly, unable to tolerate non-physical existence for long. ;o)))

Gemini please val

For Helen!! (Intrigue no more)....... TAURUS: Leaving the body, Taurus realizes that he or she no longer has a stomach and immediately returns to the body (thud!), without seeing tunnels, light, God, etc., making Taurus skeptical for the rest of his or her life. ;o)))

Sagitarrius please.

Ha! Ha! Very true as I do love my food!! Helen x

LOL Deanna!! Right then Maddy - Cancer - same as me - this had better be good!! CANCER: Cancerians can live to be 125 years old, and they don't usually have near death experiences, but they can come awfully close to having a near life experience when they get brave and venture out of their house for 'supplies.' Ooooer dont like that much!! True Though! ;o)))

Pisces Please! Marie

Val!! Loved this one!!............ GEMINI: The key thing to the zodiacal twins isn't the experience itself, but how they can embellish it when telling the story (or writing about it). Since Geminis are comfortable in all worlds, except those without telephones, they usually bounce back to the body fairly rapidly-- and the mouth tends to work before the rest of the body comes back to life. ;o)))

Quite close but I,m taking up line dancing in two weeks time so at 72 its not as bad as all that is it.Lol Specially as I have two left feet.PMSL Maddy

Vanessa!! You Ready For This Hun???............. SAGITTARIUS: Sag floats out of her body and has to laugh at the stupid way she bought the farm. After somehow BREAKING the tunnel of light, she absolutely refuses to return to the body, since she's been trying to get out of it for all these years (via clumsy accidents). Because Sag is immensely curious about whether the so-called organized religious have any validity at all, this stroke of luck leads to some amaaaaaazing lessons, until, alas, the astral folks tire of her and trick her into returning to Earth for the duration. LOL ;o)))

Please Kim can you do Leo for my son ? Maddy

Very true I do laugh at myself and the silly things I do and say and I’m very clumsy, and also stubborn. Not surprised they want to get rid of me! Thanks Van x

Especially for Marie!!................... PISCES: For some reason, our Piscean friends barely notice their near death experiences. Instead, during a typical day at the office, many Pisceans report seeing beings with long-suffering expressions on their faces and who patiently tell the Piscean to go back to his or her body. ;o)))

For Maddy's Boy!!............ LEO: 'Nooooooo, I am NOT dead. I am not, I am not, I am not . . . Who are those guys in the white robes? What's that they're singing . . . ? They're off key. I can sing better than that! Where's the choir director? I need a microphone immediately. Unless it's Rolling Stone or Spin, hold my calls.' ;o)))