General Chat

never heard that term Steve Pr**K tease round here Dave

I think you have all said what I would say, every woman has a right to say no and be respected for it. The trouble is these days that it seems to be the expected thing for anyone, male or female, to go out and drink far more than is healthy or necesary to have a good time, and everyone is suffering from this. Young people's health is suffering and this will show itself in a few years time when there will be many people very ill or dying due to too high an alcohol consumption. Accidents happen too often due to overindulgence in alcohol, so do murders, rapes and all kinds of bad things. Maybe it is time for all those who still go out in groups, to know when they are beginning to wobble and learn to say no to the alcohol as well as anything else. A couple less drinks on a night out won't spoil your fun but could save you from a very unpleasant or even dangerous situation. Too many folk have died from being too drunk to know what they are doing, lose sight of their friends and then end up alone and in danger. In Norwich we have lost several young men over the last 5 years, who have come out of the nightclubs the worse for wear, wandered off alone and been found later, drowned in the nearby river. I am no frump and I had my moments when young, used to drink and drive too before it was outlawed - never thought anything of it at the time. I too got myself in muddles but there was always one of us in our group who would be more sober than the others and would look out for us. Never drank anything like the amount young people consume these days tho and could always find my way home, even on foot. Take care, and Steve, maybe suggest to your friend that while she is entitled to have a good time as a free agent, she should try to stay just a little more in control, to avoid such situations again. Liz

He said the C word?! that's bad enough..tut tut

Night Steve, Gillie xx

Think we'll have to have Mags One and Mags Two here LOL Yes, girls do hit on men, I don't think it's a recent thing either. I also believe there is a great deal of difference in 'hitting on' where the intention is made very clear what the expected outcome will be and 'flirting' Girls ARE more forward nowadays (and why not?) There ARE females who are out for 'no strings' sex too, it's not just men and not just after they've had a drink or two either. How a man tells the difference between being 'hit on' and flirted with would, I'd have thought, been reasonably clear from the terms used and the body language.But if he gets it wrong - rely on the 'NO'!! Mags x

TTFN Steve xx

Steve - It's fun honest!!!! xx

Mags you are such a sweetie good answeres hun Gillie you as well All i can say is it now scares the hell out of me. i would not like to have to start over againg Thanks all love ya Sxx got some work to do

No I don't see it as a problem to change your mind if you have hit on them. Initially you might think 'Oooh he's a tasty chap' then after a while you may think 'nice looking shame about the personality or lack of it' You are always entitled to change your mind. I agree that he didn't push it too far and the verbal attack was because of his bruised ego. Still no need for it.

I didn't say she was wrong, we know a lot of men don't respect women and vice versa, he may have called her names because he didn't get what he expected! but the final line is, he didn't persue it and force her into something she wasnt happy about. we all know men and women think differently,she may have said things inadvertantly that he took to mean something completely different. Gillie xx

Mags Shady Just a thought if she had hit on him would that make any difference, as lots of young girls do that now (seen it on telly) So where is the line now, thats what botherd me about her question she is 10yrs younger than me so just a babe lol S

I agree with Mags here...... but then only you know you're friend Steve and whether she was teasing beyond acceptable limits!!!

So they were all a bit 'wobbly' and things got out of hand? (no pun intended) - then I think the reason she rang you is that she realises that she acted foolishly in the first place in letting herself get into that situation and wanted some sort of reassurance from you that she hadn't been as daft as she thought. It maybe wasn't as much to do with what he called her as her own belief that maybe she was exactly that term. It has shocked her and she probably feels a little guilty, especially if she wouldn't normally behave in that way. The 'morning after the night before' syndrome; don't we all know it well? If you had said 'no of course you weren't' it would have gone some way to making her feel better and have taken some of that guilt away. Mags Proops

I have no doubt that things are very different now to how they used to be. I am a flirt, I enjoy flirting. My right as a person to flirt without being insulted (or raped) should not be compromised. As I've responded to the men who've spoken to me in a very similar derogatory way: 'Nothing is a sure thing!' (Closely followed by 'You should be so lucky!' lol)

Steve your right, there is a blurred area where the two people have to respect each other as to whats been offered and what is expected, when drink is involved it gets out of hand very quickly, if all she got called was a c*ck tease I think she probably had a lucky escape, it could so easily have been someone less nice. Gillie xx

Well said Shady! Thats exactly what I think, He did the hitting on and she responded but didn't want to take it further. I don't see how she is in the wrong.

Gillie it was him who hit on her,she just responded. So now who is the C*** tease? He was just an opportunist looking for a cheap thrill,a one night stand.It shows how much respect he has for women.

Fred i aggree totaly but it seems the world has moved on and i have been left behind Mags i dont condone any of it she asked me the question But and i know you are all gonna hate me on this at some point there is a grey area where two people have had a drink one has to chat the other up or as she said hit on me Does it then become blurd between them what is expected and what is on offer ???? I dont know lol been we 20 yrs this year an di would hat to have to start all over S

I think both men and women should take responsibility for themselves, she may well have led him up the garden path and said no at the last minute, to me any woman that would willingly go that far on a first meeting is no better than the bloke calling her a c*ck tease, if the bloke was offering you chocolate all evening and teasing away, would you not get the ar*e ache at not getting the goods at the end of it all? I'm not saying either of them are right or wrong, just making a point. Gillie xx

I am a young single woman and I frequently go out to bars/pubs/clubs and enjoy a 'few' drinks. I flirt with men, I laugh with men, I enjoy their company. But no flirting is a guarantee of anything more. I hate the way it seems one thing for men and another for women. We're trying to establish some equilibrium! xx