General Chat

I've lived in my current house for 13 years - since it was built. Lots of the neighbours are the originals. We've always been invited to eachothers parties, go out for dinner a couple of times a year all together and always have a Christmas get together. Then on Saturday one had a birthday party and didn't invite us, whilst the others went. Then he knocked today and spoke to OH and said can he not check my car of a morning before I go to work as the bonnet shutting wakes him up! (OH checks every morning as I have a long journey and it's been playing up a bit - too late to check when I get home as it's dark by the time it's cooled down). This guy is out banging around in his garage and with his car about from about 7.00 am every Saturday and Sunday. We've never complained. Why's he being such a ******** now?? I'm all for asking him out straight, but OH keeps telling me to calm down! UPDATED... AL

If he likes to tinker with cars ask him to do yours.

What a good idea. It seems something has upset them, I'd want to know what. A real shame for this to happen when you have obviously had a nice little community there for so long.

I am absolutely fuming at the moment, but know I'll have to say something. He always tries to act like he's better than everyone else, but I can ignore that, because there's always one! I just don't know why he's turned on us - we've never had words, although I could have a number of times with the ways his kids scream around and cause havoc. Currently trying to calm down, but it's not working at the moment! AL

I find it best to sleep on it if you still feel the same in the morning maybe ask him out right but dont shout at him you are better than him keep calm.

I will keep calm when I speak to him, that's why I haven't been over there tonight. I try to catch him off guard too - always a good thing! I just find it upsetting that he's picking on us. I love my home, I love the area and, until now, have never had a problem with any of my neighbours. I don't like feeling uncomfortable in my own home and don't know what we've done!AL

Do you have one of the other neighbours who you could ask if they have heard what he is upset about? Ann Glos

Did you read a thread a few days ago it was called when i look out of my bedroom window you will see a lot of us have problems with neighbours. It helps to come on here and talk about it.

Hi Ann OH is going to try to 'catch' one (unobviously) and mention it to them. He spoke to one the other day and asked what had gone on Saturday night - she said IDIOT had his 40th birthday party. He said she seemed a bit embarrassed. I don't want the neighbours (most of whom I consider good friends) to feel uncomfortable. AL

Hi Vanda Couldn't find it. Has it been deleted, or am I having a blonde moment? AL

sorry it should have been bedroom window just been updating my last post

Hi Vanda I did read this when it was originally posted and remembered thinking how lucky we were with our neighbours! 13 years we've been neighbours and never had a crossed word 'til now! AL

I hope you can sort it out and become good friends once again. Maybe the hot weather has been getting to him.

To be quite honest, I don't think I would ever want to be friendly with him again. I'd never trust him again. AL

Anyone else got any advice? AL

How about having one of the get-togethers (a few drinks or BBQ perhaps) and asking him along personally? See how you go from there.

You don't have to friendly AL, just be sickly polite. Sorry no advice, take care Heather x

Must admit had the same prob with my neighbour (now ex neighbour as he moved on). We'd given him loads of help with the house, garden etc, lent him tools, driven him to airports when he was going away. One day he just turned icy cold on us, had a go at me about the dog barking all the time (never mind that it was another dog barking in the garden behind him) He turned into a right pain after that - in fact he turned into a schoolboy with the swearing and two fingered salutes. He does move house a lot if that tells you anything :-))

If he were to say hello, I'd reciprocate - I couldn't be rude, by ignoring him. However, if he were to ignore me, I'd just ignore him straight back. As for a 'do', we're actually in the process of decorating the whole house, so we've got stripped and semi-stripped walls, carpet pulled up, etc. Also garden's looking a mess with lovely brown straw for grass at the moment and droopy plants (we have a hosepipe ban). This guy's always been a bit 'keep up with the Jones's', and I refuse to play ball. Also, lost his company a few years ago and is now working as a plumber, with a substantially reduced salary and, according to what he told OH, a very large mortgage. Maybe he's peed off that we're not keep up with the Jones's sort of people and that we have a small mortgage which we are hoping to finish paying off shortly? I really don't know what to think. OH is going to try to 'bump into' one of the other neighbours today for a discrete word. We'll see what comes of that. AL

Perhaps 13 is the unlucky year. As some of you know, we were in our little bit of paradise with wonderful neighbours for 13 years until my dear next door neighbour died and the executors sold to this pig of a man and his family who have spent 2 years now extending and renovating (sometimes at 5.30 in the morning!) and they havent even moved in yet. We have a court case against him for destroying 20 odd feet of our hedge and trees and he just plays silly buggers, offering a settlement then 4 months on renaging on it and offering us £50! He is a stupid, silly ignorant person and the wife looks like her idol is Posh Spice. Im dreading them moving in - if they cause this much trouble before they have moved in, what will it be like afterwards? I just wish I could wave a magic wand and get back to the peace we once had. I worked my butt off for this community in the last 20 years and yet not one of our neighbours have put their head up over the wall to stand up for us. They all tut tut and sympathise in private but none have come round when we have had face to face confrontations and supported us. In future I will keep myself to myself as people seem to do as the less you have to do with neighbours - just a nod of the head and hello - seems to be the best course.