General Chat

A discussion has been going on about this question in another thread, but many of us would like to bring it to attention more prominently.

Did you know that if someone clicks on your username in one of your posts on these boards, they can see your full, real name?

Did you know that if you are a married woman using your husband's surname, and you send a PM to someone, or receive a PM from someone, both of your surnames are revealed to them, on your PM and in their contacts list?

Did you know that when you send someone a PM, or receive a PM from someone, a name from your family tree (probably your own) appears alongside your name in their contacts list?


Are you shocked to learn this?

When you choose your "community name" in your account details, GenesReunited tells you:
"Hide your real name and show a friendly alias when posting to the community boards"

That is false. Your real name is NOT HIDDEN. It is simply not displayed. It can be seen by anyone who clicks on your username.


Unless you have *expressly* made changes to your "personal details", that is what happens. Your real name is available to anyone who cares to look.

It is a terrible, terrible idea to disclose your real name, and any other identifying / personal information, on the internet. You do not know who is looking.

There have been people using this website who have psychological problems, and people who are just plain untrustworthy. If someone should unintentionally cross them, there could be unpleasant consequences.

You do not want every stranger who happens to read these boards, or send you a message about a possible connection, to know who you are, unless you choose to tell that particular person.


To fix the problem, you need to do this.


1. Change your account name in your account info.

Click on "My account" up near the right corner of this page. You will have to enter your password again to access your "My account" page.

Then where it says "Your personal details", make yours like mine:

My first name is Evie.
My current surname is Beavie.
My birth surname is Beavie.
My community name is EvieBeavie.

-- or something equally completely false. ;)


2. Change your name in your family tree

Don't delete yourself from your family tree. If you do, this system will just attach another relation's name to you in other members' contact lists.

Don't use your username as your tree name. I am not Evie Beavie in my tree, and I am not my real name either. I happen to be "E B". And my birthdate isn't quite true, ha! If I were Evie Beavie in my tree, I could be found on tree searches, and I don't want to be.


Now -- once you make those changes, it works *retroactively*.

Everyone who has you in their contacts list will now see your (fake) community name, not your real name. They will see either themselves or your (fake) name from your tree as the "relation". (I think the name they see depends on who sends the first PM.)

You do NOT have to delete contacts or delete PMs. Your info will be changed in those lists *automatically*



Are you extremely surprised to learn about this, and do you find this whole situation horrific? I was surprised and horrified, when I first realized that people were seeing my name when they clicked on my username. I have used many internet discussion boards in the last 15 years, and I have *never* seen such a complete disregard for users' privacy and security.

If you feel the same way, please add to this thread and TELL GENESREUNITED.

And please spread the word to friends here at GR if you see them giving away personal info that you think they might want to keep private, whether through their account details or by chat on the boards.

These boards *can* be read by non-members, and do show up on google searches and the like (although only logged-in members can click your username to see your details and send PMs.) And none of us has any way of knowing who is reading, GR member or not.

pm'd you

x

Nononono! Pleeeease, do not everybody PM me to check their details! (Sue, you were the first, but you werent the last ;) .)

Get yourself a security buddy - you send them a PM and have them check what your name says, and what appears in their contacts list. Then they reply to you, and you check for them.

Here, here, Berona. Like to see this thread last for ever, EvieBeavie, but I am doubtful, yet living in hope. I feel really angry with GR, rather misused and very misled.

Meri - feeling not so merry.

Sorry EB....lol

I'll try to change it tomorrow as it won't let me at the moment. I know when GR kindly renamed me as ******* ******** my full maiden name without warning I changed it fine.

Thanks for bringing this to the boards.

Sue x

Anyone changing their details needs to check regularly that they have not reverted to their original details,having changed my membership to single NOT continuous it stubbornly reverts to continuous.

I meant to mention another benefit to arranging your account details so your username is the same as your account name.

Ever got a message from Mary Smith and thought ... who the heck is that and why is she acting as if we're old friends?

You'd been chatting away with LittleLulu on the boards for weeks, and then one day LittleLulu sends you a PM ... only the PM is from her real name, Mary Smith. And you have no idea what LittleLulu's real name is, because you've never clicked on her username.

I know I've scratched my head more than once!

If you make your username and your account name the same, you'll never make me go clicking around to try to figure out who's sending me PMs.

Me or anyone else as easily confused as me. ;)


And Lindsey, ta, I'm going to keep an eye on that too, since the time is drawing nigh ...

I find Facebook is a bit worrying. All sorts of people are chatting on what I thought was 'my' page. I was invited by somebody to look at her photos but if I reply to her it will let her see everything I have there. I have not replied.
H no English name.

Thanks Evie.......have it sorted now....

sally

Just tried to go into my account but now I don't have to enter my password it comes up automatically then I just click. Goodness knows how this has happened as I haven't changed it. Off now to see if I can delete it.
Just tried to change my details it asks me to confirm my password which I did but says error that e mail ad and password are being already used. Nothing is easy on this site.

Evie

You are so right & that is why i changed mine a couple of years ago so now when you click on my name you see me as . წ.Julie.წ......& in my contacts i come up as Julie ~~~~~~~

I did when i 1st came on here i did have my Surname on but took it off about 3-4 years ago.

Evie, Thanks for your reply to my PM,

XX Bob
PS,
from what I recall, when Genes first started, I and many others used our REAL names , I soon realised that was too much info, and dropped my surname, and added a location , later I changed again during the GB relay,to honour a lady that is no longer with us.
and now use the GPS addy that is near to my location,

Bob

Well hopefully, all any one will see now is that I am Harp Strings and married to Mister Harpstrings. My membership runs out in June and wont be renewing.

Bit of a problem here, then.

In order to comply with the site T's and C's.....i.e.

"....By registering with us you agree to provide complete, accurate and current personal data about yourself including your correct name and email address,...."

Well in that case when they have sorted out the security issue then I will go back to proper T&C thats if I am on here long enough - totally pee'd off with it all.

Det
thanks for that info I will try that.

Berona
when I click on my account in the password box it has the dots and you just enter. Thing is I always entered my password here before (it was a blank box). Maybe I am getting to old and grumpy but it seems to me that everytime GR make changes we get problems of some sort.
Anyway I did change my name.

I can't change anything! If I try to change my surname, I get an error message saying I can't use this 'site name' and to select another. I'm not changing my board name, just personal details. HELP!!

Sheila, I still have the same problem

Sue x

So why when I try to change details message comes up saying ERROR that site name is not allowed?

Sheila

When you click on your name as if to send a PM it's fine i can only see your 1st name


But if you are talking about the contact bit where i have put ~~~~~ i did that through my tree