General Chat

Liz, shame we can't get this channel here in Holland, only BBC 1 & 2, otherwise I would definitely watch.
There was a series some years back on the BBC, about some extreme cases of people hoarding, one being about a lovely old man, can't remember is name,but he had a job to even squeeze his fragile old body in through the front door.Anyone remember him? I think he was Polish.Very touching!
I have managed to get rid of a lot of stuff from my house, thank goodness,but still keep things out of sentimental reasons.
Good luck Liz, you WILL get there.

Eileen x

Betty, sounds a lot like me. I always say one day....
I went to my house today and felt really down about, it my wisteria outside has grown up the wrong bit again and is creeping over the roof, the last year's growth I cut from out of the bedroom window but the dried stuff left got caught by the wind and pulled roof tiles off so cost me £50 to get fixed. The garden is completely overgrown, my roses are beautiful lol, and so no one can get anywhere near the house via the back way which makes me feel the house is secure. However, I could only lean out and cut a bit back so still some growing and don't want more problems with the tiles so after the holiday will have to get something done about that, also a down pipe has come undone, never did fit properly cowboy builder and plumber, and so the corner of the wall is green and slimy and there is black mould on the inside, another worrying problem.
I think tho that these problems will make me deal with the whole thing when I get back so hopefully I can start bringing things out and getting rid so I can get workmen in and fix the boiler on a grant and other things.
Eileen, that man was Mr Trebus and he has died now, he ended up in a home, but kept taking the cutlery to his room lol Bless him.

Lizx

Hi Liz,
Yes, that's his name, thanks for that.I remember him going in to a home, being well looked after, bless him.Used to watch with my aunt, we were sad when he died, he was a real character.
The mould inside your house sounds bad.Hope you get it all sorted soon.

Am off to bed soon.Tired after this morning's fiasco.

Eileen x

We have had five and a half Transit -loads out of our two bedroomed council house since my mother died.My own hoarding is a learned habit which I can deal with and I do feel much better for a good chuck.Nevertheless,I do have an awful lot of bottles of nail varnish and one of those kits with the UV light which I have used once.How often do I wear coloured nail varnish?Two/three times a year.Then there are the cookery books.......

I watched the program and of course not having anything by Prada to thow out ! I filled 3 bags for a charity collection tomorrow, If I can get through the night without bringing them back in again !
I agree with the churning situation, just moving things around, I do a lot of that.
I wish I'd taped it, need to watch somthing like that every day.for inspiration.
(Hi Sharron}

I recorded it and watched it later when o.h. was in bed, as he wouldn't have let me watch it without making sarky comments.
I did find it hard going, I related so much to all those women except the designer one lol mine have Primark and c&a labels, yes that's how far my stuff goes back and more lol.
I will get him to make me a copy to keep and if I can persuade him later to do a second copy could send it you maybe Lindsey. I know when mine got out of control, and there were so many things going on, it was hardly surprising.
Take care, all of you, and keep trying to get shot of a few things, I certainly must do more to get things under control.
Lizxx

Thankyou, but dont worry its bound to on again, everything else gets repeated ! Besides I blame my friends for giving me stuff, I used to work in a charity shop and people used to give me loads to take what I wanted and pass the rest on, which I did, but after retiring they carried on bringing things.
But I have nobody else to blame for the books, my precious books.........!
Im sure that the dust these things harbour also help make you feel so dreadul, ill even as while the weather is better letting fresh air in helps . I am my own worst enemy!

O.K. Lindsey, yes you are right, lots of progs are repeated. I would never be able to help in a charity shop - I would be wanting to buy everything I saw. My chronic fatigue and funny sleep habits have advantages as most days I am up and out too late for the charity shops, I used to haunt all of them and buy loads of things, which mostly never got used, altho I did wear lots of the clothes.
I try now to take back books I didn't enjoy much but keep 50% to read again, I will have to live to 120 or longer to get through them all lol
Lizxx

Well roll me up in a blanket and I can sleep for england, count to ten and Im out for hours., any time of day or night !
At this rate I'm not going to wear out..!!!

And so to bed , nite.

bless, night Lindsey, hope you are in the land of nod by now lol
Lizx

Dear Liz, acknowledging the prob is the first step, we know that, I know I'm in a similar pickle with papers.
My ex m-i-l had a weird one, she collected plastic bags and had a dozen and half large boxes neatly lined up in her bedroom "plastic bags 3"x5", plastic bags 10"x12", plastic bags with poppers, etc etc. The crowning box was one marked "pieces of string too short to use". I am not making fun, to see that box gave me my chuckle for the day when she was driving me crazy, kitchen piled high, couldn't find the counter, basement knee-deep literally in magazines, and the storeroom so full of bottles you couldn't get in the door. She kept every candle, no matter how long or how burned. When the forsythia started to bud, she would cut dozens of branches and have them sitting in the sinks and bath, in addition to every vase in the house. She had an enormous jade plant, tied up with strips of her husbands striped PJ's, she left it in her will, to the children's hospital for their lobby!!!!!!! Needless to say the PJ pieces were replaced. What she thought they wanted with a tree-size jade plant was beyond me!! There's always hope-especially if we recognize there is a real problem.
Hugs
Mary

Liz

C&A labels LOL.....I actually did something about my hoarding yesterday. I got rid of three black bags of childrens clothes. Nothing bigger than age 2. My youngest is almost 10. Tho a lot of the stuff is older than him as in my daughter dresses she'll be 16 soon. And C&A labels featured amoungst these things.

Shelli

P.s must add when I say got rid of I mean I got them out of the room. They're currently sitting at the top of the stairs, waiting for me to be brave and place in bin shed. And I still haveatleast three times more stuff to sort through.And thats just the kids clothes

Ahh, yes Mr Trebus. What a lovely gentleman he was, God bless him. I felt very sorry for him, as in his mind everything was normal, he must have felt heartbroken when all of his possessions were being thrown away. I did have to laugh at his antics in the nursing home.

Did not get to watch the programme last night - OH had control of remote!

I hope it helped you in some way Liz?

Tina xxx

Ahh, yes Mr Trebus. What a lovely gentleman he was, God bless him. I felt very sorry for him, as in his mind everything was normal, he must have felt heartbroken when all of his possessions were being thrown away. I did have to laugh at his antics in the nursing home.

Did not get to watch the programme last night - OH had control of remote!

I hope it helped you in some way Liz?

Have just read some of the replies - Lindsay - I can relate to books - oh my gosh - went to an auction house and came home with over 200!!!! Some of them are still in boxes and will never get round to reading them, but they are MINE. If I want to move them from here to there and back again I shall lol.

Oh dear, I really must take a long hard look at myself, do you know I think we all have this in us to hoard it is just to what degree.

Tina xxx

It was interesting to hear the lady say that different clothes held different emotions. It was the inability to let go of those emotions, - good or bad, that held her back from getting rid of the clothes 'linked' to them.
I thought she did very well to be able to let go and start to clear out.

The 'designer labels' lady was buying clothes which didn't even fit...Her problem seemed rather different, but troublesome nevertheless, not least because of the enormous personal debts that resulted from it.

Gwyn

I do hope the programme helped Liz. I don't have OCD but I do tend to hoard, mainly books and magazines. the strange thing is I can get rid of things if I am giving them to somebody who needs them. Like FH magazines, i have loads of back copies but will part with them to another FH enthusiast. couldn't put them in the rubbish though for the life of me. Can send clothes to a charity shop but not put them in the bin. So i even send them if past their best so they can dispose of them (I do know they sell the rags in some cases).
Books I have so many that I have had to put them in the attic (I check them regularly for damp. My OH despairs of me and says if I go before him he first thing he'll do is order a skip!!!

as you know I did have a clear out recently, had to do everything in one go to make myself do it. Felt very virtuous afterwards.

Ann
Glos
Ann
Glos

Interesting to see that both Lindsey and Liz sleep a lot.I can remember sleeping as much as possible to avoid the constant verbal abuse.What about the bit in the narcissism article about your possesions being taken from you and given to somebody else without your permission?Now that couldn't possibly lead you to hoard things could it?

Ann
I can identify with alot of your thoughts. Do you think ours is an age thing perhaps?
I was brought up with a 'waste not, want not' way of thinking, by parents who had known 2 World Wars and hate the idea of throwing away anything that can be useful, but quite happily pass things on to others to use.

Gwyn....also with an OH mentioning a skip.

interesting about the sleep/hoarding bit as I sleep way too much.

Tina, Mr. Trebus was a lovely old man.He scared us though when he climbed over the fence etc. to get into his house.The council man-if that's what he was, seemed a caring sort of man, tried hard to help him and showed great respect to him.Indeed, his mind was completely normal, love him.
There are probably an awful lot of us who tend to hoard things 'just in case' or because from sentimental reasons.