General Chat

I was older when something bad happened so maybe it does not really count. But to ALL that have or going through bad things. Lots of (((((HUGS)))))

nutwood x

OK deff off to bed now! lol c u 2morrow x

I've been writing about my life for my children, because I never talk about it, I think they should know. My children have never had to go what I went through, I made sure of that, I also hope that my grandchildren don't go through what my kids did, there you go! Why do hormones get in the way? I know I would be a much better Mum now than 30 years ago!

Dee x

I'm okay with it, Dee - have a marvellous blocking system LOL
I asked my doctor for my notes a few years ago as neither me nor my parents knew the actual reason I was sent there, and I was intrigued - It had jaundice symptoms, so could have been one of the hapatitises.
Strangely, my notes for that time were missing!!!

Banchorie has closed down. It was on the 'Restoration' programme a few years ago. I thought I recognised it and was describing the glass walls - which was when my children wanted to know about it. I may make a last effort to get my records from the Scottish Health Authority. If I know what illness demanded that treatment, I may be able to 'bury' it!!!

maggie

And there was me thinking all this awfull stuff happened in the 1900s

I hope you came out the otherside ok, I really do think that all these trials are tests for some reason, God knows what though lol

Take care

Dee x

1960 or 62, Dee

Dee, that's awful - you couldn't get away. I knew my incarceration would end sometime - I knew I would eventually get too big for the large cot, and go back to my parents.
Parental/sibling abuse must be the worst.

How long ago was this Maggie?

Banchorie was fairly remote, my parents lived miles away, we didn't have a car, and there were 3 other children. I believe they visited me twice.
I had no schooling and nothing to play with.
I often wonder why the staff were so antagonistic towards me. If I was 4, I had a very 'plummy' English accent, we also lived in a caravan - to be more precise, when I was 4 we lived in a double decker bus in the middle of a field - obviously 'scum of the earth', although dad was in the Fleet Air Arm, mum didn't want to live in married quarters.
At the hospital, they didn't believe I could read & write and wouldn't give me a pencil or paper.
My saving grace in that place was the fact that the wall between me and the next room was glass (with a curtain) - and there was a much older boy, and 2 men in there with TB (which I didn't have) - but the staff happily walked between the rooms.
The boy asked the nurse to give me some of his paper and a pen, and we used to write notes and pictures, pull the curtain to one side, and hold them up to show each other.

Oh Dee, yes you would have had Social Services on to your Dad like a ton of bricks. You must have felt so bad going through that.
I am glad you feel your life since has not been so bad, and that you and your sister did ok.
Lizxx

I'm pretty sure we only get what we can deal with, my life has not been so bad, some might not think so. I don't usually dwell on things gone by too much. My sister says considering our upbringing we didn't do bad.

I'm sure it wouldn't get past the authorities now, but 40 years ago I used to go to school with black eyes where my father hit me and cut knees where he had dragged me over the nails in the lino on the floor.

I've been there and my thoughts are with all who have suffered

Dee x

How brave you all are to talk about these things, that maybe most of you have kept buried for such a long time.
I think I have been very lucky, altho I have lots of problems which stem from my childhood, I don't recall anything that would amount to abuse in any way.
My Mum used to go bananas when she caught me and another young friend, under say 9 yrs of age, playing doctors and nurses with the older girls next door, in the shed that they used as a playhouse. We had our tops off but that was all and it was all part of a game, was nothing sinister that I recall, but can remember wondering why my Mum was so angry. That said, my Mum was always very protective, over protective of me, and a bit prudish too so I am sure that was all, and there was nothing 'wrong' going on.
I hope by speaking out you can all feel more comfortable with the past and put it behind you now. If things are still bad, don't be afraid to ask your gps for counselling to help.
My admiration and good wishes to you all.
Lizxx

Gonna have to go soon, OH will moan if he wakes up lol

Maggie, I just don't know what to say, the only experiance I've had of being in care was when I was about 2 or 3, could be younger. The only thing I remember was not being able to see my sister and being forced to eat jacket potatoes, I still can't stand the smell of them. What upsets me most about this period in my life is that my family deny this ever happened to me. Funny though, I can remember where I lived before it, where I lived after it and who collected me from the home and where we went. Quite traumatic events for a 2 or 3 year old to remember!

I agree Maggie, it's the same sort of treatment that had millions of us disgusted at the conditions in the Romanian orphanages 10 years ago. Abuse like that seems to have been swept under the carpet of our country's history.

I was in Banchorie Isolation Hospital for 3 months when I was either 4 or 6 - that's how much I had blocked it out - can't remember how old I was!!
I blocked it until my eldest was born - then told my husband.
Blocked it until my grand daughter was born - then told my children of the treatment I received there - both girls said it would amount to child abuse nowadays.

The main point is that I was incarcerated in a cot in a room on my own for 3 months - couldn't walk when I came out. I had one bath (used by others) the whole time I was there, and they washed my long hair the once - with soap. My mum took me to a hairdresser to shave it off as it was so matted. The unseen abuse I received while there is just icing on the cake - I would like to stress it wasn't sexual - but force feeding and slaps, amongst other things are still abuse.

maggie

Night, you too :-)

Nite SS

Stay strong

Dee x

Damn. LOL oh well... guess I'll just have to keep my fingers crossed for next week then.

errrrrrrrrr sorry lol