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I want the Truth Now

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Mick from the Bush

Mick from the Bush Report 6 Sep 2007 00:38

Long long ago in a Courthouse far far away, a particularly rude and arrogant Magistrate demanded that his clerk get him a glass of water immediately! Not wanting to waste the Magistrates valuable time the clerk scooped a glass of water from the toilet bowl in Chambers and gave said glass to him!

Sally Moonchild

Sally Moonchild Report 5 Sep 2007 22:27

An ex-girlfriend took her spite out on my sons car - his pride and joy.......she scraped what she thought of him across the bonnet.......only problem was she could not spell and it came out - barsted....luckily he worked in a garage and got a cheap respray....

Kelly

Kelly Report 5 Sep 2007 22:21

every woman needs revenge everynow and again lol

PinkDiana

PinkDiana Report 5 Sep 2007 22:16

I have giggled so much at these.

Worst I ever did was drive my car straight into the side of Ex's car whilst he was watching from a 3rd floor window!

Well he had just kicked a huge dent into my company car that was going back the following day! And no he didn't admit to the insurance company it was me!

;o)

shymo

shymo Report 5 Sep 2007 22:12

When i found out that my now ex hubby was having an affair, i put sardines in a bag & taped it to the underneath of the passenger seat! Left them there 4 over a week, (in the summer!!) so u can imagine the stink!! Took him ages 2 find them!! lol The following month I slashed all his tyres! & yes, i wood do it again.

Susie k

Susie k Report 5 Sep 2007 22:10

LOL...it's very tempting

Contrary Mary

Contrary Mary Report 5 Sep 2007 22:06


Too right Susie.....I've made a note of the best - or should I say worst ;-)) ones LOL

Mary

Susie k

Susie k Report 5 Sep 2007 22:01

I know Mary LOL....and the best thing is they might come in handy one day....pmsl

Contrary Mary

Contrary Mary Report 5 Sep 2007 21:59


Oh you girls are sooooooooo wicked!! I'm in pain from laughing here :-)))))

Mary

Lady Cutie

Lady Cutie Report 5 Sep 2007 21:42

when i was first married in 1961
i'd had a row with oh over him eating my pudding
so when i made his sandwiches for work the next day , i said to him iv'e done you some salmon sandwiches oh nice he says .
only they weren't salmon.... they were kit e kat
with a nice lettice leaf in each sandwich.
wonder why he came home with a stomach ache lol
Hazelx

NOG

NOG Report 5 Sep 2007 21:32

pauline yousssssssss the girl pmsl

(¨*•.¸(¨*•.Pauline loving my grandson(¨*•.¸(¨*•.

(¨*•.¸(¨*•.Pauline loving my grandson(¨*•.¸(¨*•. Report 5 Sep 2007 21:22

My now ex husband had an affair when we were married he even had a child with someone else between our 2. So i made him a pie with pedigree chum, which he ate and said was lovely but the best thing i did was cleaning the toilet with his toothbrush and putting it back in the holder that was 17years ago i don't think i could do it now and to this day he still dosen't know aww bless him lol paulinexx

Tina-Marie

Tina-Marie Report 5 Sep 2007 21:14

My ex friends husband took his revenge on her (she was having an affair) by moving out and filling the bed with the rubbish bin contents and all the nasty stuff stored in the garage.... on the day she came out of hospital having had a hysterectomy.

It was a very amusung sight though, boy, did it smell!

Tina x


Susie k

Susie k Report 5 Sep 2007 21:05

When i was in my teens I was in Ireland on holiday with my Grandparents on their farm we did a lot of cooking....everyday one of my uncles used to come home and say 'Susie where's my pie'...drove me mad!
So.....I made a lovely pie for him...... a cow poo one!
He found it and ran off up the field ripping the plastic bag off with his teeth, with me chasing him...(trying not to laugh).....then he took a nice big bite!!

I nearly wet myself laughing....he didn't find it very funny though.....lol

Maddiecow

Maddiecow Report 5 Sep 2007 20:35

Im older and wiser now lol

Maddiecow

Maddiecow Report 5 Sep 2007 20:21

Rosie and Kelly you naughty peeps!! Christine you naughty girl you reminded me of a discipline I got working on a still very popular Mag many years ago.

We had a note round from the editor in chief that had supplied vending machines for crisps and chocs a few months before - saying that it would be a disciplinary offence to eat at our desks.

So I wrote a memo saying I cant remember exactly but something the effect that although the vending machines were here and we worked our nuts off at all hours to meet publishing deadlines if we purchased snacks from the machines and ate then at our desks we would face a disciplinary procedure.

I then Photocopied the bottom half of his memo onto mine with his sig and one night stuck copies on all the vending machines (inc fags we could smoke in those days).

Was great hoot but someone grassed me up :( Wasn’t so funny then).

Juneoftheroses

Juneoftheroses Report 5 Sep 2007 20:09

Many yrs ago I worked in a chemist shop
We had a under manager who was always scrounging sweets from us.
we had sweet revenge we doctored a few of them with laxative
then stood back to watch the effect it had (Bliss)
June xx

Catherine from Manchester

Catherine from Manchester Report 5 Sep 2007 20:05

noooooooooooo

OMG

no wonder you feel guilty lol

catherine
xx

Rosi Glow

Rosi Glow Report 5 Sep 2007 20:02

Ok.....I will explain :o)

I have to add that I have felt very guilty for years after...

A good few years ago for reasons I wont go into, I scratched a few naughty words on someones Mercedes with a cork screw, bent the windscreen wipers in half, and glued up the lock, then found out two days later it was the wrong car!!!


Kelly

Kelly Report 5 Sep 2007 19:58

a few years ago i fell out with a best mate from school for stealing an ex boyfriend!
i didnt speak to her for a good few weeks until one night we were all round at a mates house and who should b there?but her and my ex.
so after a few drinks i went into the garden and picked up some dog poo on a shovel and put it down her coat sleeve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and poured water in his shoes so they were wet through ha!
needles to say were all friends again now but they still dont know it's me or they just havent said any thing.and they have been together for 8 years now and happily married for three.

i do feel bad about it know as it was them who got me and my husband together but i dont think i'll tell them they might kill me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!