General Chat

Is it someone you can have a laugh with, someone you can gossip with or someone you can really talk to? Or a bit of each? Is it differences or shared experiences that work for you or just something about someone? When do you think you've made a mate out of someone - does it take time with you or do you sometimes click instantly?

A mixture I suppose, but loyalty is always a quality to admire. (No, I'm not in the Mafia) My Momma always said friends were like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.

Yes :)) All the above :))

OOOhhhh nice thread David, I always thought you should be honest with your friends..... But most of mine wanted to hear otherwise.......... I now know who my friends are........and who are just wasting my time!!!!!!!! Friends should be honest with each other..........and if you don't want to know.........don't ask......!!!! I have never lied to any of my so called friends............but if you want to be told the truth..... Have loads of 'friends' who pop up when things are.......tough. My real friends know me really well,I'm so glad to say. No nonsense..... Stel.

All of the above - but most of all I think trust is the most important thing. A true friend you can trust with anything...and you can trust their word. There is nothing worse than believing someone to be a friend and they turn out to be two faced. I am quick to form acquaintance but slow to form real friendship. I suppose the number of true friends I consider I have can be counted on one hand Magsxxx

I like David too. But cross me and you'll sleep with the fishes. Capiche?

Mags, I'm with you........ Real friends LISTEN...........and act accordingly! I found my best friend when I was 28!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A bit late in life.......but there now........as I am for her! Stel.

Trust is important to me too. So is honesty Stella - with real friends I need to feel I could say anything I wanted without offending them (bit naive sometimes lol) I have lots of acquaintances I really like but I'm like you Mags and don't consider many people true mates but then I have a mate I haven't seen for years I'd still think of as one of the best II've had and another person I've not even met that I'd consider one of my best ones. Lynda - I'm like you and make up my mind very quickly and a lot of the time it's about how I felt when I first met them. Course you liked me - I'm lovely lol. Mags! Two-facedness is the thing I hate most. I don't mind having a bitch with friends (quite enjoy it lol) but what I despise is people calling others behind their backs and then being nice to their faces grrrr:)

lol Daniel - yr scary

A true friend is someone you can trust and share things with. Someone who will be honest with you. Someone who will call just to say hi, or pop in for a visit because they want to see you. Not someone who only calls or visits because they want or need something.

Oooooh David - a man that understands! LOL I think there is nothing worse than people taking you 'under their wing' in the guise of friendship....Patting you on the back with one hand and stabbing you in it with the other! LOL Stelly - You can find good friends at any age. My 'oldest' friend I met when I was 11 but it took me another 40 odd years to meet a true soul mate. Magsxx

I understand about the best friend that you haven't actually met David - some people might be disbelieving - but you can have a cyber friend in much the same way as those you meet face to face. I think you DO get to know people if you chat to them often enough. Much as if you were talking to someone 'in the flesh' - you pick up on untruths or variances in what they are telling you. Sincerity does come through. Magsxx

I may sound naive saying this but there are certain people I've just clicked with.People I've never met or even spoken too but still they're like kindred spirits (you know who you are!). I've made some bad decisions (I put it down to lack of wisdom) but I have had my life enriched by people of every colour and creed etc. I'm a very lucky girl to have such amazing friends! love becx

I learned.......and am still doing so.......... And hope I will still........learn to trust......... Difficult though when your 'so called' friends come back to 'ask your advice' What would you want to say?

I think everyone seems to agree about true friends.... Tell the truth....even if it hurts at the time just be there to comfort. Accept the truth ....even if it hurts and still be friends. Someone who is always there for you no matter what. Someone you can tell things to and know it will stay with her/him. Trust. My best friend and I met when we were 11 - 44 yrs later we are still best friends. I agree that you may not meet a true friend until later in life but it will be worth the wait. Jacquie

A friend - someone I can trust and feel safe with. Some people you just instantly click with - have met a few on here - and when I have met them face to face it has been the same. Have a friend I have known since I was 4 and a half years old and we are still good firends - dont see each other very often , but can pick up the phone and continue the conversation from where we left off. I know a lot of people, but am close to only a few - I wont allow my defences down with ,most as I dont know them well enough . Sadly I have had the ultimate betrayal from a so called friend a few years ago - but STILL she contacts me - only to see what is going on in my life - but I dont let her know anything :-) My mother used to call these people fair weather friends - only there when things were going well in your life but nowhere to be seen when you really needed a friend.

I think Martin Luthor King said it in those great words of his 'In the end it is not the words of our enemies we will remember,but the silence of our friends'. Dave

Hi David, A true friend knows all the bad stuff about you but loves you all the same. I have 3 really close female friends, two from schooldays and one who I met when our sons were babies. I live miles from all of them now but when I meet them it is as though we were together yesterday. My other best friend died 3 years ago next month. We had been friends for 20 years and clicked the moment we met. We knew and kept each other's secrets and relied on each other for support and advice. He was always there to pick me up when the world threw nasty stuff at me and I tried to be there for him. He was one of the funniest people I have ever known and he could make me laugh until I cried. I still miss him every day. Gwynne

goodmorning everyone when there is something wrong then you fand she will help in any wayind out your true friends are i had two and when iwas getting divoiced ,had no were to go i ask one friend and she didnt want to upset my husband,so i ask my other friend and she just said yes no questions no taking sides,and we have been friends 41 years ,i bring her over to the netherlands twice ayear and we ring each other 3 times aweek,and she will help you no matter what and its ditto for me as well ,now thats friendship.joyce

David, I agree with what most people have said, being truthful is the first thing for me, though. I think a true friend will go with you through the good and bad times in your life. I have friends,who I can count on one hand, just like She has, even if you haven't seen them for ages, it is like yesterday when you speak / meet up. The phone bills are usually horrendous lol !!! Sue :))