General Chat

some people can put it in words exactly what your trying to say and me i and up writing a russian novel

Twinkle - that is exactly what I was trying to get across. I'm glad that at least someone isn't cross with me! Thanks Kaye x

If posting trivia on this board is insensitive, does that make people posting on the other boards insensitive too? After all, peopel were offering Ancestry look-ups all of yesterday, and there were still many people on the Tips board. Two people posted stories on the Success Board. The London attacks were barely mentioned apart from on this board. There are an awful lot of people who did get on with their normal routine, and I don't think they can all be accused of being insensitive or uncaring.

CB i didnt start this thread to have a go at you , and hope you never took it like that, i added my understanding at your worrys on your thread, and hoped all was ok , as you didnt say if hubby and son had been in touch, i didnt see the thread in question, but just philips reply on your thread, and felt for the two of you, as it seemed like both were feeling shock at the days outcome, im sure he was worried about his family as his son may travel and pass through london, though i lived in surrey , we were pretty close to london and windsor, and i know my mum would have been on the phone had we still lived there, from what i read everyone felt understanding for you , but you seem cross with everyone, could be the shock and stress , just want you to know , i sympathise with all involved yesterday, and those who replied to this thread like twizz and philip if he reads this , im here to listen, you want a shoulder , im here, dont worry about telling me, write it down on here and itll help you im sure, well ill be in majorca for 2 weeks but feel free to mail me, click on my name and ill get it when i get back, i will be thinking of you , i promise, and CB i wasnt having a go at you by writing this thread

Look I'm sorry you're so upset CB - I really don't mean to upset you. I feel that you are misinterpreting what I am saying and I am truly not picking on you. I had and still have no objections to the number of threads on this terrible attack and have added replies to many of them, but there was room for more 'trivial' threads too. Everybody deals with this sort of thing in different ways and I thought there was room for all opinions on here. Far from picking on you or attacking you I actually felt too intimidated by your thread to respond to it initially - I feared the backlash! I am sorry that you thought it insensitive for some of us to try to find some normality - but please believe me it was not intended that way. I do not wish to fight with anyone on here - I like to live and let live, so please accept that I meant no disrespect and do not leave the boards. Kaye x

hi philip, my hubby is an ex squaddie, he served in ireland etc............ he has a much different view of these things than i have. which is totally understandable. please do not leave this board, i read some of your replies- and understood what you meant. i am sure you have seen things many of us never will see, or want to see... sue. xxx

I agree with CB When the thread was posted it was very relevant & Philip had no right to speak to her in the way that he did. He may have had a valid point to make but there was no reason to be so rude to CB or anyone else who was concerned about friends & family.

If you think it's OK for Philip to be aggressive, that's up to you. If it was you he'd gone for, you'd see it differently. If you objected to there being so many threads about a national catastrophe, why not pick on the ones that appeared later in the day? Indeed, let's leave it that we disagree, but don't pick on me in future. CB >|<

I think you are being unfair CB. I understand that you were worried about your family and other peoples families and friends - I think we all were. But your thread was rather aggressive and I didn't reply to it because of the backlash I thought I would receive! No one was trying, in any way, to belittle what had happended today or what you were feeling; but some of us felt that a little 'trivia' to keep our minds from the awful events in London was not a terrible crime. How many threads can you have on one subject? I do understand where you are coming from, but I do not think that Philip was being a bully - he merely put across his own point of view in defence of the title of your thread and some of us happened to agree with him. Unfortunatley we can't all share the same opinions so please can we just agree to disagree on this occasion and leave it at that? Kaye x

Well, to all of you who've seen fit to criticise me today, I'd just like to point out that I'm the daughter of a Coldstream Guardsman who was in the Regular Army for many years and was called up from the Reserve in 1939 a few months after my brother was born. He fought in Europe at Monte Cassino in Italy, and in the North African campaign against Rommel, during which his brother-in-law was blown to bits at his side. When I was 12, my father died after over 2 years of battling cancer. Towards the end of his life, when the medics could do no more for him, he came home to die - a skeleton of a man who had once been a well-built six-footer. I had to help nurse him (bedsores, bedpans - the lot!) while my mother was at work, and I had to cope with him being delirious and raving about his wartime experiences. I'm no stranger to the horrors of war and bomb blasts - I learned about them as a child, and despite his horrific experiences, my father would never have seen fit to criticise someone for being anxious about the safety of their loved ones during a terrorist attack. I found Philip's attitude disgraceful, and I fail to see why he felt it necessary to be worried about his son working in Dorking, Surrey which is some 25 miles South of Central London. If he was worried about his daughter-in-law, why does that give him licence to take potshots at me? I didn't tell him to remove himself from this Board - that idea was all his own. I just told him what I thought of what he'd said to me and responded to his accusation that I didn't care about 9/11. I couldn't very well care about something when I was under a general anaesthetic for most of that day, and he had no knowledge of my having watched News 24 intently over the next few days, yet he feels he has the right to make such accusations. I don't see what difference his being an ex-soldier makes, and if bullying people is how he exhibits his concern for his daughter-in-law, it's very strange from my perspective! To anyone who accuses me of over-reaction on the thread I posted today, I'd just like to point out that for most of the afternoon, this site would not allow me access to the thread on which Philip was so abominably and unnecessarily rude to me. I tried many times to update the thread title that I'd put up when I first heard the appalling news this morning, but I kept being told 'This page cannot be displayed' or having my posts rejected. Earlier this evening I was trying to remove the thread, but I couldn't for the same reasons, then I noticed Em's posting about her parents and messages left for her, and I thought it kinder to leave the thread in case she hadn't seen them. I'll say again to all of you, how would you feel if your nearest and dearest could have been at death's door? If your loved ones have been in mortal danger, you'll know how I was feeling when I put up that post this morning, and if you think that was over-reacting, then you're entitled to your opinion, but don't lecture me when, for the seventh time inside a year's GR membership, a man has made a personal attack on one of my threads or posts. They really do go for it, these guys, but it's strange how they back off when the girly fights back. I'm seriously considering leaving this site altogether in a couple of weeks. NOT, I hasten to add, because I'm scared of being bullied, but because I'm sickened by the way people who do the bullying are feted and treated with kid gloves, like some kind of hero; and then at other times someone has a slight sniffle and there are 30+ posts of hugs & syrup; and then there's a major terrorist attack with 37 dead and hundreds injured and people on this site want the trivia they call 'normality', as if the disaster doesn't matter! What a weird sense of priorities some people have! CB >|<

You are a very kind and gentle lady julie Anne xx

Don't disappear too Twizz, your experiences are 100 times worse than anything the rest of us have experienced and it helps puts our panics into perspective. I couldn't even begin to do what you have done and I have a huge amount of admiration for your courage. Bev x

its ok twizz anytime

All I can say at this moment in time is Thankyou Julie Anne

thanks twizz you men should speak out more , not bottle it up, i know its hard for you to do as you think you should be strong , and understand you cant talk about certain stuff, but it must help to let some of it out, feel free to use this thread if you want you may reduce me to tears but carry on, im here and so are many others to listen trouble shared and all that

Louise CB was clearly distressed which is I think why no one said too much on her thread. But people were posting obviously without realising what had happened. When you want to post a thread you don’t necessarily even glance at what’s already on the board and therefore I think there was a slight overreaction to this. I am not, and I don’t think anyone is attempting to belittle what happened today, but I suspect that the GR general board would be the last place anyone who was seriously concerned about the welfare of a loved one would have been this morning! I was glad to see ‘normal’ threads beginning to appear on the board this evening, after the (countless?) doom and gloom threads of the rest of the day, during which I regularly escaped to muck around with the ‘names summary’, just for a break. It has been a bad day, and I hope Philip realises that emotions were running high this morning. Tomorrow is another day, and we Brits will stick together and we will get over this. Bev x

Having had to pick up dismembered body parts after car bombs , take photo's of babies blown apart by bombs , watch my wife and kids shake with fear because a car bomb blew a hole in our wall in the quarters we were living in , I know where Philip is coming from , I suffer from flashbacks and nightmares from things I have seen and had to deal with in my life in the forces and as an Aid worker in Bosnia and Serbia , and I feel that people like Philip should be listened to and understood and not decryed just because he like me has a different way of coping with situations like today. Think I have said enough so will go

It looks to me that the thread in question has been removed, which i think was definitely the right move. Hopefully this can all rest now. I hope Philip reads this thread, Julie Anne. Thank you for having the guts to be the first to comment! This is how genes works at its best -supporting each other rather than sniping. I'm signing off now. good night to all. Let's hope there's at least some peace tomorrow for all of us. Sal.X

I am ashamed to say that I didn't have the guts to reply like this to the original thread - I was going to after just reading the title, but after all the nonsense recently I decided it was probably better to just send a personal reply to Philip. Also, by the time I had decided that it might be a good idea to say something more publicly there was a reply on there about someone's parents not being ok - I didn't seem appropriate then! Kaye x

sadly i didnt see the thread till it was too late, i hope philip your reading this and you can feel the warmth of the feelings people have on here and understanding, take care of yourself, my now 18 year old came home to visit nana and grandad when she was about 4 year old with me , and stay here for a while when daddy was on exercise, as grandad was about to open car she said wait gransh , you gotta check underneath it first, she had taken everything in at that age