General Chat

Hi sorry to hear of your troubles.This guy is intimidating you to extreme.I hav had similar in the past-there are injuctions/restraining orders and harrassment-I know hard but try to ignore him he is enjoying this-what a sicko-why do peeps get off on making others lives hell?I feel for you know what u are going through and hope you can try not to let this **** get to u.Good luck and speak to your solicitor again about what action u can take.sending u a ((((((hug)))))))))))Kat

Hi Heather, Sorry i don't get to be here very often,but managed to get here today and read this thread. It must be horrible for you, especially when you have done so much for the people around you and they don't seem to support you. It seems to me what you need is some support most of all, bad things happen but if you know you have support you can face anything, it would be a gamble but maybe it would be good to see who your friends really are, the weather is improving... i wonder what this guy would do if you had a BBQ or a nice informal garden party? I know it sounds stupid but he seems to thrive on the intimidation factor, its hard to intimidate more than 1 person. I don't want to sound patronising but decent people win, not always straight away, but always. Be strong, don't let him win, time will come. Be thinking of you Donna:-)

Heather Haven't got any practical suggestions to make I'm afraid, but you have my sympathy and also positive thoughts for the correct outcome in the court case. Stay strong xx

heather, when my son in law was putting a camera up on the wall a policeman came to him and told him, he must keep it focused inside he's own property, as if he trains it public property he is breaking the law. he phoned the police station, and was told the same.

Heather, if you do get CCTV then sure go and tell him, and everyone else, maybe that will put a stop to it all xx

When I was being stared at by that thing next to me I called the police and explained all what had been going in the past and that it had sat and stared at me in the garden and then waited on its doorstep the following day until I came up mine and turned and did the same again. The police said I should documenmt it all. If its actions were making me feel frightened etc., I could take it further for harrasment. I'm sure with all thats been going on with yours it would be viewed the same. Apparently if I'd gone ahead it would have been warned if it carried on it would then have been taken to court. The staring stopped so I didn't want a war as I've had so much from it, its never ending something always waiting to start. I really feel for you as I know only too well how it makes you feel. Good luck with it. Dianex

Thanks, guys, will dry my eyes now as hubby just pulled into drive. Bless you all for just listening.

Heather - I'm so sorry you are being put through this torment. I can understand the effect it's having on you and your family. We used to live next door to a very inconsiderate couple - not as bad as your neighbour, but it's not a time I'd want to live through again. Our prayers were finally answered when, completely out of the blue, they moved out. I have never felt relief like it - life returned to normal and our sanity was saved. I just hope things turn out as well for you. In the meantime keep a close watch on little Ralph. Jay xx

I am thinking may be I should go to the police station and ask if I can just put on record that these things are happening. They already have on record that we called out two officers because of the sickel at hubbys face episode so at least we would have it there if anything happens to me (he has threatened to give me grief) or if hubby has to defend himself. At least then it will show this has been a prolonged harrassment, wouldnt it. Lady Lucan, you wont believe this, but if you have a cctv camera you are required by law to also have a notice telling people it is there. Having been through the horrors of the last year, I can really tell you that the law is an ass and Ive no doubt he could get us done for filming him. Believe me, when you are totally in the right it means nothing.

One of the things that has really really upset me is that I have helped so many people in this road - from doing their shopping, writing letters, sorting out council probs or help with social services, looking after their pets if they were in hospital etc. but now they are all just keeping their heads down and dont want to know. Its really taught me a lesson. That is an idea about having someone with you but I never know when/where he will be. On Saturday I was walking Ralph down the road and someone stopped to chat to me. I didnt know them but they asked about Ralphie as he struggles on pavements and I picked him up for them to kiss and stroke him. As I was chatting to her I heard a car slowing down next to us. It crossed my mind someone was going to ask directions. I turned and there he was, window wound down just staring at me. The other woman looked at me puzzled and I just shrugged and carried on talking to her and he drove off.

The police have just served an harrassment order on my ex son in law on my behalf as he was doing the same sort of thing to me... so I taped his abuse on a mobile phone and tape recorder attached to the landline... had witnesses with me when going out to witness him videoing me... and he has this order against him for a year... if he does anything to invade my privacy during that time he will be arrested and can get up to 5 years imprisonment!! So justice can work sometimes... go to the police and ask their advice heather. Anne:)))

Thanks peeps, this is my only outlet as I darent say anything to hubby who gets so wound up I fear for his health. Its incredible how there you are in your own little piece of paradise when someone can come along and turn your world upside down like this. Ive just seen him drive by and into the house next door, which means I cant go in the garden now with Ralph as he stands watching me. Also, he has taken all the original stake and wire fencing out that side of the garden (he originally claimed a boundary dispute which he dropped when our solicitor sent him a list of evidence back to 1947). Solicitor has told him that his deeds has a covenant to erect and maintain a stock proof fencing the whole 450 feet of garden. He had ripped it all out so now he has to replace it but is doing this slowly as he can, sometimes only a foot a week. This means I have to carry Ralph into garden and stand like a goalie as he mooches around for a pee or poo as the gaps are the whole length still. I can currently hear a chain saw going next door - it churns your stomach, it really does. On top of that I know hubby will be home shortly and dread the way he will be when he sees the guy there again after the episode last night. I am wondering whether to take a photo of the tire marks all along the verge outside our drive (where NFH so engrossed in staring ended up half on road and half on verge last night). But I guess solicitor/police would say no proof it was his tires - and they definitely wouldnt bother to even match the tires to the photo.

Heather Whatever you do, don't let him get you down. If he does, he will think he is winning. It might be worth talking to your solicitor about some sort of injunction or restraining order. I am no expert but I am sure something can be done about this idiot. regards Jerry

Trish, the dreadful thing is solicitor still says, Well you can never tell how a case will go, even if you are in the right. Unbelievable isnt it - he will probably delay it as much as he can anyway. Ive no doubt he will put in daft counter claims (like the £400 for lopping our trees- further down the land - Solicitor wrote and said basically we never gave him permission, he never asked our consent, he never gave us notice of work and if he has lopped overhanging branches without necessary expertise he may have damaged or destabilised our trees. But, see again, another couple of letters going back and forward, so once more he has won another couple of weeks time. This last letter she actually said to him 'Our clients and their legal expenses insurers have no option.............' This will be the first time he learns that all his letters in order to get us to spend, in his mind, £50 a time for solicitor to reply to has in fact cost us nothing.

Hi Heather I don't have any advice other than what has already been said but I just wanted you to know that I feel for you. Home is where you want to feel happy and secure and it must be terrible to have all this going on. It will resolve itself eventually, one way or another but in the meantime (((((((hug))))))))). Chrissie xx

Heather, carry on with the court proceedings. He is just a bully and trying to scare you into backing down. Is it possible, do you think, to get one of those orders out on him where he isn't allowed to go within so many yards of you (forget what it's proper name is.) You have my full sympathy as I know what you're going through.

We,ve got one as well,,,,,,,,we have a single track road up and down to the village...I usually just smile and wave as he drives past, stoney -faced........Annoys the hell out if him..........! So I have heard...

Oh poor you - hugs x Perhaps you need to find some squatters for him? Then get them to claim squatters rights he'll be so busy fighting them in court he won't have time/energy/money to bother you. xx

And to be honest, we called the police that time he started hacking down more of our hedge just opposite hubby who, bless him, was trying to get mums plants back to life. He had a sickel just inches from hubbys face hacking whilst hubby told him to stop. Police arrived 5 hours later, said could only do something if hed actually wounded hubby! I told them then that he had said to me i 'didnt know how evil' he could be. But basically they werent that interested. Unless someone actually assaults you they dont want to know.

Thought about taking a camera out with me (i know youll think Im mad, but I am terrified he will do something to little Ralph - he can see how much we love him) but he would say I was harrassing him if I took photos, wouldnt he. And that he was only staring because I was pointing a camera. He is so awful. I just pray every night he will sell the place and never move in there. And hubby looks so frustrated because he feels like giving the bloke a good slap but then we would be lost.