General Chat

Thinking of you Jennifer My love Mau (((XXX)))

Jennifer I've only just read this thread. Please, as all the others have said, don't blame yourself. Go forward in life, as I'm sure your son would want you to do. I can't begin to imagine the inner turmoin you must be feeling, but take comfort from the fact that many people are thinking of you, and care about you. Take each day as it comes, and try and find something good in each one. It might be something very small like seeing a beautiful flower, but each thing will help you along the way. Take care. Love PP xx (((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS AND PRAYERS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you Julie x

Jennifer Im sending you hugs as you sound like the most wonderful lady and you helped me a great deal, Take care my love, Carolxxxxx

The list is quite endless but if you Google SADS or CRY you can read it for yourself.

Maybe it might help someone if you could list the medications. Ann Glos

Hi Jennifer This thread seems to have got lost in all the commotion on the boards at the moment. Hope the tests & results come through quickly. thinking of you Penny

Been to see my GP and she did not hesitate to begin arrangements to have us all screened -got information today about SADS and apparanetly eight young people a week die like this - there are many people who are fund raising for screening to take place and some schools have had visits from these volunteers and all children are screened, but nowhere near enough-the list of medication that should be avoided if you are at risk is quite lengthy and I know my Stephen was or had been taking two of them, even inhalers are on the list-so we need to make people more aware of this illness-that can so easy be fatel. Thank you for all your kind words. They helped alot.

Jennifer, I just wanted to offer you my support and ((((hugs)))), I can't add anything to the wise things that have already been said here. When someone we love dies it is insinctive to look for someone/something to blame. For the sake of your other children and Grandchildren please don't blame yourself, blame whoever gave it to you, or medical science for not finding a cure. Blaming yourself is counter productive, your family need you to be strong. I am sure that the suggestion to fund raise for SADS and/or SIDS is a good idea. maybe raising money for a trophy to be given in Stephen's name or something similar to his old school or a club he belonged to would also help. Thinking of you. Ann Glos

Jennifer hope you feel a little better this morning. Don't know what to say to make you feel better it has all been said. Take Care Thinking of you Germaine x

Hi Jennifer Hope you have woken feeling better today & can go to the doctors with a clearer head. Last year I found out I have a skin cancer which is genetic. I can't find anyone in the family before me that had it so it must start with me! I have 2 young boys who could get it. Medical research is moving on all the time so by the time they are worrying who knows what has been discovered. The worst time for this condition is the first 2 years - I'm glad I didn't know I had it then otherwise every time my boys were ill I would have been constantly worrying that they were going to die. I have got involved in a support group for the condition - perhaps you could too for SAD. thoughts are with you Penny

Jennifer - you are in my thoughts and prayers. A friend of mine lost her baby girl to SMA - which is also genetic. The whole family have been tested and the results have taken ages, please dont feel that you are to blame - nature can be a horrilbe thing sometimes. The suggestion that you become involved with raising awareness of SADS is a very good one. My friend has done the same thing and it has certainly helped her, the family and the whole community come to terms with a tragedy. Hope u take comfort in the words from all of us on here and that we are here for u. Love Lorraine

Hi Jennifer afraid I am a bit ignorant about SADS. I do know people that have had cot deaths. Just wondering is it only you that could be the carrier or could it have been his father?

Thinking of you Jennifer, love suex

I can't begin to imagine the pain you are in after loosing your son, it must be dreadful i only hope in time the pain will ease. looking to blame yourself or anyone at this time is probably a way of you trying to make sense of your tragic loss. The blame is not with you or anyone. Shirley Ann.x

thoughts and prayers are with you at this trying time tina x

Jennifer, I am sorry you are feeling so bad about the reason for you losing Stephen, but as others have said, it is not your fault. A friend of mine from school had three children and it wasn't until his third baby was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis that the doctors realised what was wrong with his older son and daughter. Maybe if the diagnosis had been made on the first child he and his wife would not have gone on to have two more children, but because they had no idea they were both carriers, they did have those children. They lost one son at the age of 16 I think it was, and another a while later, but their daughter who is not quite so severely affected is now in her 30's and has done lots of things with her life, travelling and studying and working. If my friend and his wife had known about the cf and not had those other children they would not have had the joy of knowing them for the years they enjoyed together and their daughter would have been an only child and possibly mollycoddled. Life works out the way it will, we can't take all the blame or all the credit. Celebrate the years you had with Stephen, make sure you and your family are tested and then go out and enjoy life. Do things Stephen would have encouraged you to do. As a memorial to him, maybe you could become involved with anything that promotoes SIDS or SADS - fundraise to raise awareness and to get money to help with scientists finding ways to identify this illness early on, or to help find a way to stop it happening. My thoughts are with you. Liz x

Just wanted to let you know am thinking of you and all your family at this time! Kaz x

((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))) for you Jennifer because that's all I can offer you. Sunny R

Jennifer, A young girl who was at my daughter's school died of SADS last week.She was 21and her funeral is tomorrow. I met a lot of her friends tonight who remember so many thngs about her and although her death was sudden and sad no one can be blamed. If it is something in the genetic makeup then that has to be accepted just as blue/ brown eyes, red/ brown hair. A girl from the same school year died earlier in the summer in a car crash. Perhaps someone can take blame for that but at the end of the day what matters is both of these girls gave joy and love to their familes for 21 years. They were also loved in return. I am sure it is the same with your son. He loved and he was loved. He will be missed and it hurts. But do not blame yourself. You kept him alive and with you all those years to make memories for everyone. Jacky x