General Chat

I dont like Christmas Diana, to many family tensions, arguements and broken relationships, lost both granparents christmas week too, A hug for you at such a hard time for you,xxxxxxx caz xxxxxx

It is always difficult the first year-it's 10yrs for me since mum died and It has gotten more bearable-if you have a cry it don't matter, shows you care. thinking of you. catherine xx

Hi Pink I am dreading it this year, I am trying to keep busy, but just end up in tears everytime I think about it. Hugs to you all janey xxx

Diana The first Christmas is VERY hard, we lost our dad on 19th Dec 1975 ,the day after one of my bros birthday(bless my dad he knew he was going but told me on the seventeenth he wasnt going to die on my bros bithday cos he couldnt do that to him!!) Because it was so near Xmas his funeral couldnt be till after Xmas ,and cos Dads birthday was the 28th we rejected that day . we didnt want to let him go on his birthday. He was cremated on the 30th Dec. It was my worse Xmas EVER!!! and the next year all the light had gone from Xmas still. WE all made sure MUm was cared for every xmas after.til she went five years later. Dad went in 1975 but every 19th Dec I especially remember him . and Mums birthday has just past on the 14th Nov.with many thoughts too on that day. It isnt easy but as each year passes comes an acceptance that they are gone physically but still very much held in our hearts

Xmas not a happy time for me either. Too many bad memories. I try and get back to normality A.S.A.P. i.e. Boxing Day. I love the build up - but after the day it means very little to me.

Definitely. We'll be here, booze, log fire and a big hug. Oh and probably some food if I can be bothered to leave the booze and fire and drag myself into the kitchen! Daisy

Thanks Daisy.... I may well do that over the Xmas period! I think this one will be doubly painful, cos we had such a laugh last year just me and him!! God I miss him so so much xx

I remember my first Christmas without dad - it was really tough as the gap was so evident. 11 years on it is now much easier and I can look back on happy memories without getting too upset. I know lots of people who have lost loved ones this year and my heart goes out to all of them, including those of you on here - as Jess has said the 'first' everything is really hard but for most people it does get easier with time - not that we ever forget, just that we do move on and adapt to life as it has to be. Love and hugs ((()))) Kate

Huge hug ((((((((XXXXXXXXX))))))). Point car in direction of M11 and you know the rest - any time. Daisy

The 1st year is really hard, I did have a few tears on my own, but what I tried to do was keep up all the traditions that my mum and dad had. It made me feel that I was not forgeting them and also reminded me of the many years of happiness I had with them at christmas. I also made a decision not to go to the cemetary on christmas day with flowers but go on christmas eve and put flowers and a little christmas tree for them. Things do get better in time. Jackiexx

There's been some christmas's in the past I have dreaded but only because of the shear expense of it all, having a big family and all. But this year, I can't wait, im looking soooooo forward to it. Don't have to get a christmas tree or decorations got them all the year before last. I was im hospital all over christmas last year as I was having my daughter who was born on Boxing Day, so this year is going to be lovely as we have our new family member to spoil. Them little fingers are going to be everywhere!!

sorry that you are dreading christmas pink Love Joycexx

It will be our first Christmas without Mum, who died in February but I hope it won't be too bad. Yesterday would have been her 95th birthday and although I thought about her almost constantly through the day, I felt strangely calm and remembered all the wonderful years we'd shared. I had been dreading the day because for years I had always travelled to Hampshire to stay for a while around this time, so that I could be with her on her birthday. Hopefully Christmas will be OK too. I know Mum would want us to still make it a special time for our grandson and I'm sure that throughout the day, she won't be far from our thoughts. Gwyn

Well, after a lifetime of very bizarre Christmas's, one uncle going mad and crawling on floor thinking he was a lion..we continued eating, an aunt who took the carving knife to my Dad just as he was about to carve, projectile vomiting over the Christmas Pud, death,famine, mass hysteria....any Christmas now which is halfway peaceful.... is a bonus. BC XX

Not going to be an easy Christmas this year with so many sad things happening. The sudden loss of my father-in-law in July is going to make very hard on my MIL and my husband but I'm hoping our 3 year old will be able to take everyones mind off it even if only for a little while. (((((Hugs)))) to everyone facing christmas without a loved one. Fiona. x

I dread this time of year for fear of lossing another relative. We lost my gradfather 2 years ago just days before christmas so our first chrismas without him we were still in shock, then last year we'ed lost nan in the Septembre so it was a duble wammy come christmas. I can't promise that it will get easier, but time is a good copeing tool, some how it lets us find a way to deal with the heartache without going mad in the process. I'm sure Evie will look after you. (((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))

Yes..Hate it, and new year.. Me just having a soppy moment thinking about my dad too... When everyone else is toasting the new year in i'm usually found bawling my eyes out watching the fireworks wishing daddy could see them too, and thinking about another year without him... It's a really emotional time for me, but i get by every year because i know he's not really that far away.. LOU XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx

As you know Diana it'll be our first without my Dad too........ and I'm trying my hardest to put a smile on me face, I've always loved this time of year .... it's hard isn't it? there will be a gift under the tree for my children from him and always will be so as to make it a little more bearable for them too. ((hugs))

D I too have a bad time with Xmas as my dad died at that time too..xxx

I hate christmas - bad memeories, sad memories, they get easier, believe me. Once you get past the 'first' everythng it gets better because you have lived thru one, done it once you can do it again jess x