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Here, here, Berona. Like to see this thread last for ever, EvieBeavie, but I am doubtful, yet living in hope. I feel really angry with GR, rather misused and very misled.
Meri - feeling not so merry.
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Nononono! Pleeeease, do not everybody PM me to check their details! (Sue, you were the first, but you werent the last ;) .)
Get yourself a security buddy - you send them a PM and have them check what your name says, and what appears in their contacts list. Then they reply to you, and you check for them.
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A discussion has been going on about this question in another thread, but many of us would like to bring it to attention more prominently.
Did you know that if someone clicks on your username in one of your posts on these boards, they can see your full, real name?
Did you know that if you are a married woman using your husband's surname, and you send a PM to someone, or receive a PM from someone, both of your surnames are revealed to them, on your PM and in their contacts list?
Did you know that when you send someone a PM, or receive a PM from someone, a name from your family tree (probably your own) appears alongside your name in their contacts list?
Are you shocked to learn this?
When you choose your "community name" in your account details, GenesReunited tells you:
"Hide your real name and show a friendly alias when posting to the community boards"
That is false. Your real name is NOT HIDDEN. It is simply not displayed. It can be seen by anyone who clicks on your username.
Unless you have *expressly* made changes to your "personal details", that is what happens. Your real name is available to anyone who cares to look.
It is a terrible, terrible idea to disclose your real name, and any other identifying / personal information, on the internet. You do not know who is looking.
There have been people using this website who have psychological problems, and people who are just plain untrustworthy. If someone should unintentionally cross them, there could be unpleasant consequences.
You do not want every stranger who happens to read these boards, or send you a message about a possible connection, to know who you are, unless you choose to tell that particular person.
To fix the problem, you need to do this.
1. Change your account name in your account info.
Click on "My account" up near the right corner of this page. You will have to enter your password again to access your "My account" page.
Then where it says "Your personal details", make yours like mine:
My first name is Evie.
My current surname is Beavie.
My birth surname is Beavie.
My community name is EvieBeavie.
-- or something equally completely false. ;)
2. Change your name in your family tree
Don't delete yourself from your family tree. If you do, this system will just attach another relation's name to you in other members' contact lists.
Don't use your username as your tree name. I am not Evie Beavie in my tree, and I am not my real name either. I happen to be "E B". And my birthdate isn't quite true, ha! If I were Evie Beavie in my tree, I could be found on tree searches, and I don't want to be.
Now -- once you make those changes, it works *retroactively*.
Everyone who has you in their contacts list will now see your (fake) community name, not your real name. They will see either themselves or your (fake) name from your tree as the "relation". (I think the name they see depends on who sends the first PM.)
You do NOT have to delete contacts or delete PMs. Your info will be changed in those lists *automatically*
Are you extremely surprised to learn about this, and do you find this whole situation horrific? I was surprised and horrified, when I first realized that people were seeing my name when they clicked on my username. I have used many internet discussion boards in the last 15 years, and I have *never* seen such a complete disregard for users' privacy and security.
If you feel the same way, please add to this thread and TELL GENESREUNITED.
And please spread the word to friends here at GR if you see them giving away personal info that you think they might want to keep private, whether through their account details or by chat on the boards.
These boards *can* be read by non-members, and do show up on google searches and the like (although only logged-in members can click your username to see your details and send PMs.) And none of us has any way of knowing who is reading, GR member or not.
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