General Chat

I'm the youngest of five but was by no means 'spoilt' in any way by my parents or siblings, My mum used to say that you rear the first, then the rest can 'rear' themselves!, I have always been very independent, left home at 17, married without my parents blessing or attendence at the wedding at 20. (still married) Of all my siblings I am the only one still happily married.

I'm the oldest of two, my brother is two years younger than me and I always considered him to be spoilt.

I certainly can be bossy but he was never having any of it as a child and has always done his own thing, as have I. We didn't have to have hand-me-downs and never shared any toys, being one of each sex.

We never had anything in common and, as we usually socialised separately, we could have been only children! We don't keep in contact much now, either.

I always thought two children was boring, all sitting tidily around the table, so I have three of my own which I think is very nice.

My f-i-l was one of 18 and said it was difficult to remember all the names, especially of those who died very young.

I am youngest of 8, 3 sisters and 4 brothers I was spoilt even by eldest sisters and brother but even now if there is a problem they all phone me
I have 1 girl and 3 boys

i am the eldest of 4 i was spoilt, and did most things my own way, it paved the way for my poor 3 brothers who coudnt do anything after that my dad was very strict with them oopps sorry bruvs...

I'm similar to Ann in Glos as I was 8 when my sister was born. Liked being an only child for those early years. When my sister came along, as the eldest, I was always expected to be 'old enough to know better' whereas my sister was always 'too young to understand'. This never changed....when we grew up and my mother was old, I still had to do everything because mother thought my sister 'couldn't be relied on'. Mum, she never got any practice!!!!! My brother arrived when I was 15 and was spoiled even more. Because I was the eldest, despite passing all my exams, university wasn't an option, parents thought I should be paying board to help keep the rest!

In my experience I would say my siblings had far more things, far less responsibility, less expectation of them and sadly it didn't stop when we grew up!

On the positive side, I grew up more quickly, was self reliant and responsible and have always stood on my own feet.

I too was adopted and brought up as an 'only' but then found I was the fourth of eight on one side and the first of five on the other. I swing between the total confidence of an 'only', and the total insecurity of an 'adoptee'. Was with my birth family for my first two years, so with three older 'halves' and right at the end a baby full sister (not yet managed to trace her) Then brought up from age two as an 'only'. Don't know which is uppermost, the confident public school educated 'only', or the insecure Council house born number four, whose whole family totally disappeared from my knowledge at aged two.
Eileen
birth name
still seeking full sister
birth name
Jennifer Ann .......no father's name on birth cert.
born 22nd September 1945 in Woking Maternity Hospital.
Our mother Muriel Ethel M.......nee H....... lived in Bisley.
All the rest of the family on both sides traced.

I was adopted at a few months old.We got my sister when I was 4and 3/4.The three quarters was always important,not sure why.I was always "the good" one and sister the mischievous one.I was always the one Mum rang when there was something worrying her when she had dementia,and my Aunt was the same.I think it was partly because I was the eldest and partly cos I was the "Bossy Bitch " as mum used to say!!!!!!!Bless her.I t was always said jokingly(bossy maybe ,but never a B****)!!

I am the eldest of three, I am 10 years older than my brother and 15 older than my sister, I remember mithering my mum and dad for a little brother or sister and was thrilled to bits when I got told I was having one, after 10 years of being an only child. He was born at home and the midwife shooed me out of the bedroom until she had put his nappy on lol. My sister coming along 5 years later was another bonus.

I was always brought up to believe that I was the eldest of two but found out a few years ago that I am actually the third of five!!

Bev

Lol Awdrey...you can say that again! BCXX

Hi - Middle of three. Older sister (6yrs), brother 3yrs younger. Not a good position to be in. Sister seemed to be grown up as we were growing up. She never got blamed for anything, but was more like a mother to us than a sister, as she looked after us at night while mother worked for the Zavaroni's, and dad lived on board ship. From my sister I did learn to knit and do french bobbin knitting. Brother always crafy, and still is, and I got the slap even if I had done no wrong.
Mum went to work in factories to keep him at Grammer School until he was nearly nineteen. I would have loved that education, and got it for myself when in my 50's. When he had made his way in the world, he never as much sent parents a birthday card, Christmas Card,Mothers or Fathers Day Card. Very ungrateful
Julia in Derbyshire

i am oldest of two . just me and my brother 3yrs between us , he was terrible always in trouble always blamed me !!!! . but we are close now . my father is youngest of 14, my mother is youngest of 4. and i have 6 , all close together one girl who is in 3rd child and let me tell you she was worse than all the boys!!! lol, but now she has a son herself and lives away from home she says now she knows what i went through . they all fought and really they still do fortunately for me only 2 still at home and they are 13,14 and still fight with each other, funny as it is, my two oldest dont get on , the two middle ones dont get on. so i think just having a child is a precious gift no matter what the little s.o.d.s get up to rofl

I grew up as the youngest of the whole extended family, younger sibling, youngest cousin and so on and I used to get left out at times and looked after at others. But I don't think it's had any lasting effects on my life.

Youngest..~~~~~~~~~~ waves to Susan with numbers

I'm the youngest of 4. Two elder brothers 6 & 7 years older and a sister 4 years older, so I was very much a 'little pest to them!'
Did my position affect me much?
My brothers went to boarding school, so during term time, my sister used to have to look after me, and during school holidays, my brothers had that pleasure!
Despite attempting to kill me a few times, I always managed to outwit my brothers. My sister suffered most, as I would bite her until she hit me then go crying to my mum!!
The younger of my brothers used to call me thick as I couldn't always answer his 'trivia' questions. It was only when I was older that, at 6 years younger, I realised I shouldn't have been able to answer 'O' level questions!
However, 30 years later I got my revenge - we both (independently) took an initial 'Mensa' test and found out when we phoned each other to brag about it. So we decided to pay for and take the proper test - he to prove he was cleverer than me - me to prove he wasn't. We both got exactly the same score!!!

My sister is more sensible than me. Elder brother was always very quiet and distant. We all have totally different personalities, but get on very well now.
I suppose the only 'bad' thing about being the youngest is that if I am in my mother's company for more than a day, she starts treating me like an 8 year old - even my own children have noticed it!!!
It's a weird (and somewhat annoying) situation when your mother treats her grandchildren as adults and their mother like a child!!


maggie

Hi Hayley and everyone else who has answered I have enjoyed reading the posts.

Wow! you have all been busy while I have been away from the keyboard :-). I must go through this again later and re-read and also count how many adverse or otherwise effects there are and whether it is just me who thought that being a middle child made me feel left out wishing I was an only child at times.

I have asked mine more questions....The eldest loved being the only one until the next child came along, hated the responsibility, felt I was harder on her and thought the others were spoilt. The middle one thinks the others were spoilt but that he wasn't Jealous of them ( this one is more laid back than others ) and the youngest.....they thought was spoilt ....... she wanted to be able to join in with them but never seemed to be old enough.

They all say that sitting around the table at meal times were the times they enjoyed together

Have any others asked their children what they feel and been surprised at their answers?.

Youngest of 9, 5 sisters and 3 brothers, eldest sister was 20 when I was born and the youngest 4,the older ones began to get married when I was about two so I grew up with my nieces and nephews for company really.
We have all become much closer as we have grown older, and all but one of us are still alive and really kicking.

Hi,

In was the eldest of four and the only girl. There was only 17 months between me and the next. I was 4 when number 3 was born and 11 when my youngest brother came along. I've always felt I was put on, having to look after my brothers and that alot of responsibility was put on my shoulders. There is a positive side to it though, it made me bring my children up differently.

Chris

Susan.........regarding the children of now.

I , like you have always tried to treat my lot the same ( I have four ) but I was shocked that apparently they all feel " hard done by " as individuals and think that the others all got better treatment...........perhaps it is a sign of the times , I think that the World we live in now is very orientated to the " me,me,me" attitude.

I think it is quite normal if a couple only ever had two children, then the eldest one is quite confident, brash and quirky whereas the younger one is usually quieter and gentler.

Ben