Genealogy Chat

When sending someone a message, PLEASE don't do it in "Text Language" Keep it polite and to the point, stating the facts ie names, dates ext and don't just ask out right for access to there tree before you both confirm there is a link and never ever ever just send someone a message asking for access to there tree without any previous communication. Don't mean to a fend anyone just think it needs to be said.
Gill x

Nudge

Gill,

I so agree with you. Being polite can open so many doors. I do not have my tree on GR simply because I am too lazy to spend the time setting it up, but if someone asks to access my tree I just ask a few questions to check if there is a link, if yes, then i am quite prepared for them to have the relevant info.

Kathlyn

Thanks Kathlyn,
I can't tell you haw many messages of late that I have received that are unreadable and requests to view my tree without any communication at all and the other way, only this morning I had tree access from someone I havn't a clue who he was with know explanation as too how we are connected.
Why do they do it????
Gill

My best received message was today.

Was Albert married to Lucy ??

Mmmm Possibly, somewhere in the world, with 16,000 on my tree i have no idea who this lady was asking about as she had removed the name from the message box.

I give up sometimes. LOL

I often DO ignore messages from out of the blue asking to see my tree!


Plus, I will not share my tree with anyone unless we have established a connection, and even then I often do not allow access to the tree but send the relevant information in a pm. It does take time to type out the information, but I'd rather do that than run the risk of having my whole tree appropriated and added wholesale to someone else's family




and as for text speak!

No No No, please!

I'd also rather not see text speak on these boards, I find it terribly hard to understand.




sylvia

Hi Everyone,

I received a message from a GR member this evening as follows:

" WE SEEM TO HAVE A MATCH "


So I messaged him back with my reply:

" RIGHT WHAT NEXT "

He's not replied yet, what are your views on this one ?

billy boy

well, I certianly wouldn't be opening my tree








I would want to know EXACTLY why he thinks you have a match


and then I would send him an extract involving only that person ............. plus spouse, parents ...... to see if there really is a match



sylvia

'In the beginning ,when green around the ears' - I opened my tree to someone who I now know to be a collector of names, she took all my tree and merged it with hers. I later, after careful research, found the ancestor 'we had in common' wasn't an ancestor of mine - too late she'd uploaded the whole of my tree, meaning ancestors from BOTH my lines were now her 'relatives'. She then opened her tree for another member who also had my ancestry attached to his tree. I contacted both of them to admit my initial mistake, the original 'taker' ignored my message, and still has my tree attached to hers, the guy she 'gave' my tree to had the decency to remove it. I don't mind HER having wrong info on her tree, but I'm naturally bothered by the fact that this wrong info could be picked up by future generations.

It was a hard lesson learned for me. I now don't open my tree to anyone, a shame really, as some members have a definite link back, I send them gedcom files of direct lines.

Hi Libby,
the same thing happened to me
One individual i feel just wanted a family.The second was a real collector of names
Made me feel awful for ages
the second person has an ancestry tree to and is constantly e-mailing my elderly cousin (who he also convinced to allow access) with the message "i've added x amount of people to OUR tree"
On the other hand
Some one contacted me recently about a relative we actually did have in common,after i had given her some info,she asked to view my tree,which i allowed with the assumption that she would allow hers,she did'nt,so i asked to see it to verify that we had the same info.
she did allow me to see her tree
but sent me a horrible message to say,that she was fed up with people plagiarizing her work!
and if i use any of her info i had to "keep it to my self" or if on line state where it came from (which i would have done any way).
Well ,
i am now in a quandary,because i have the same info on my tree as her ,plus i had already found out loads via family search and census,but had not entered the info at that time.
So now if i enter what i have found,she will think i am copying her info
I haven't taken any thing from her tree at all
She was also really rude when i asked where she sourced some of it,although she did tell me

sorry to off load like this but it's been driving me nuts
Blue

I also have had my tree "hijacked" after allowing access and it has been passed on
As this is a "work in progress" I have amended various things which have turned out to be incorrect so their trees are not correct
I feel that if "they" had checked the info themselves they would have picked up my errors and -hopefully-come back to me !

Thanks Ws,
i felt quite intimidated
best wishes to you all
Blue

Hi Blue 12,

I agree with WS, you musn't feel intimidated by this person, they have no right to say you can't enter certain info on your public tree. You are quite obviously confident that your research is correct, and as such, where you choose to enter it is your business.

Good luck.

Blue 12


I agree ...... it is your research, so don't be intimidated

isn't there a line where you can enter where the information is from???


Yes there is

.................. there is a section for NOTES in the Lifeline ........ put in there the census/bmd certificate or whatever that proves you did the work




sylvia

Thanks for the support every one
it's much appreciated
Blue

I can't see why this matters unless the ones asking to see trees are identity thieves or malicious in some way. If people want to use my research and add it to their trees - so long as it is a genuine link - I don't give a damn. It's all a bit petty I think. I just wish somebody was doing the same research as me. Sometimes I think nobody else except my cousins is in the least bit interested in an obscure Scottish barony. I bore the pants off myself so would be very surprised if anyone else wanted my stuff!!

Hi Jennifer,
you have the same philosophy as me,and i hardly ever come across any one doing my side as opposed to my husbands
So i get so excited when any one contacts me about an ancestor
I am more than willing to share info as i think that somewhere along the line we have or are related in some way.
I have shared many Certs and OPR's with people researching my line and visa versa and i think "why pay SP and the GRO for the info twice"
any way most people are generous and helpful,it's just some that get me going and manage to upset me
Best wishes to all
Blue